Hey guys Dred here and I am back after forever with a new rant! So lets get started!
I am ranting about MYSELF because of mistakes I have made. The things I do or didn't do or should have done, all that.
My life is kinda falling apart :p It is no ones fault really but mine. I have been too lazy and just refused to do the school work I need to do but I just don't. I do try to fix my mistakes but I just end up staring at my work not knowing what to do because I have already dug a hole so deep that I have no idea where to take the first step to get out. It is not that I am bad or stupid in school it's that I just don't do the work. My perception makes me feel like a lot of the work I need to do is useless because I think about what will benefit me in the future for a job and what not and then they give me stuff that i'm like "How the hell does this help me?" and I end up arguing with teachers because I really don't want to do it and want something that actually helps me improve my knowledge of things that MATTER. I find history COMPLETELY USELESS. That is just how I see it. I would have failed American history if it weren't for Assassins Creed III (thank you Ubisoft!)
And now I am still bad in history and the new AC games are the only things keeping me from failing.
I am failing my math class because I am sitting there watching FUCKING YOUTUBE because I have no Idea what the fuck I am doing. Fucking I have not known what has been going on since the beginning of the school year because our teacher sucks and looks like a pedophile with his bald head and mullot and shit and he smells like cigarettes! If I wanted help I can't get it because I gag from going near him!
I am naturally good at science but I fucked myself when I decided to not do the work and have so many F's because if I dont feel its going to be an A I dont do it or I dont turn it in and just get a Zero!
My programming class I am about to fail in because I just fucking don't know what to do because I am BORED of it! If something bores me I cant pay attention!
When I go home I just can't focus on work.
I can only focus on Video games. It is the one thing I feel I cant fuck up because It is what I am best at . Sometimes I fuck up in these too. But yano I can always recover from the small failures I have in my games. But games are also causing me to fail in school because they take up valuable study time.
I CANT STUDY
I just cant ok? I cannot Focus! I guess I can blame my A.D.D. (Attention Deficit Disorder) for this.
It has all been caving in and the stress is coming that I have just been putting to the side and now it's coming to kick some sense into me. I am feeling like my life is collapsing and it is MY FAULT and it feels like I can't do ANYTHING ABOUT IT. I feel like I have fucked my whole life over right here.
That it is only going to get worse.
I need a Miracle guys.
I feel like I am losing everything over what I have done in this year.
All I feel I have left are My friends, family, my loving girlfriend, my games, and you guys.
I have neglected you guys a lot. Lost some people recently that I wish I could have spent more time with. One of my wattpad brothers is gone now and I never got to get a response in to his last message. I am glad he didnt hate me for drifting away from him and that in his last words to me he decided to make a funny comment of how I didnt respond to him.
But yeah that is a little off topic.
I am really lost guys. Been trying to glide through life without worry and now I have to pay. Because there is no easy life. LIFE ISN'T EASY. I dont care if you are rich or poor! Life isnt easy!
If you have even a C in a class FIX IT NOW! Dont wait till last minute like I have been doing. Don't put things to the side till later. Get all your shit DONE! Doesn't matter what it is or what situation. you cannot put it to the side. Because if you leave it on the side too long its going to rush over and blow up in your face.
I can give wisdom but myself I can be quite unwise. Overall I am smart, talented, wise, caring, giving, creative, observant, helpful. But the one person I cannot help is myself.
My arms are getting weak typing this because of the stress. This stress is making me physically weak guys. I think it is also making me lose weight faster almost like an anorexic person. And I eat a shit ton!
I hate myself for letting my failures go this far. I NEED to fix it. I have to try. Because at the end of the day If I fail, They at least cannot say I didn't try.
"Triumph begins with try. You just got to give it a little umph"
Well guys that was my rant. I hope you liked it. Leave a comment down below on your thoughts or similar experiences. your opinions will not change mine but will be interesting to read. I am Dred and I will see you in the next rant! MAYBE! If I write one! Bye Bye!!!!!
