Tour life is never easy but it most definitely isn't easy when you've left your girlfriend and daughter at home. [This is a sequel to Stop The World so you'll probably want to read that first]
I know this wasn't what people wanted to happen in this story and for a while it wasn't what I had planned but October is Pregnancy and Infant Loss Awareness month which as someone who has had numerous miscarriage, one very similar to the one I'm writing about in this story, I wanted to acknowledge that somehow. I'm sorry if people are disappointed but 1 in 4 women will suffer a miscarriage at some point and it is very much a part of life that I feel needs to be talked about more because too many people suffer in silence.
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I tried not to make this graphic but I will warn you that there is talk of miscarriage and blood so if that isn't something you want to read about feel free to skip this chapter.
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They spend the next few days in an emotional bubble as they try to process the information that they're losing their baby. Demi stays in bed, Willow remaining mostly at her side while Nick goes about doing things that need done but always ending up in bed beside his girls. Before they know it Christmas Eve has arrived bringing with it so many emotions for them to process; it's their baby girl's first Christmas and that is such a great milestone but it's also the time they were planning to tell their families about baby number two. They should be giddy with excitement about everything this holiday will bring. Instead Demi wakes up with tears streaming down her cheeks and the most intense stomach cramps she's ever felt.
'Is there anything you need?' Nick asks as he sits on the edge of the bed watching Demi wipe her cheeks.
'This not to be happening...' She snaps before sighing.
'I'm sorry, I didn't mean that.' She says and he shakes his head.
'It's okay. Do you want me to give you some space?' He asks and she nods her head.
'Please? If you don't mind.' She replies.
'I'll take Willow downstairs and wrap some presents, okay?' He says leaning forward and kissing the top of her head.
'Thank you.' She replies quietly. These past few days she's wanted Nick near her, she's wanted him to hold her and tell her everything is going to be okay but today she just wants to be on her own to process what she's going through; what her body is currently going through.
'I love you.' He says lifting Willow into his arms and smiling sadly down at her.
'I love you too.' She replies. Rolling onto her side she clutches her stomach as tears roll down her cheeks.
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Knock. Knock. Knock.
'Who's that?' Nick asks smiling at Willow as he carries the little girl over to the front door. He opens the front door and comes face to face with Marissa.
'Hi, I wanted to drop these off and see how you're doing?' Marissa says holding up a bag of neatly wrapped presents.
'Hey, come on in.' He replies stepping out the way. She makes her way into the house and glances around at the less than Christmassy living room.
'Where's Demi?' She asks placing the presents on the floor.
'Upstairs... She started miscarrying this morning.' He replies quietly.
'Oh... I'm so sorry. I can go, I just wanted to drop them off.' She says and he shakes his head.
'It's fine. I'm sure miss Willow would love some time with her Auntie Marissa.' He replies gently bouncing the little girl on his hip and causing her to giggle.
'Do you want me to take her out for a bit? Give you and Demi some time alone?' Marissa asks.
'You can take her if you want and I'll wrap some presents.' He replies as she takes the little girl from him.
'Nick, I'm pretty sure people won't mind if their presents aren't perfectly wrapped... Spend time with Demi.' She says and he shakes her head.
'She wants some space which is why I was down here with this one.' He replies and she sighs.
'I'm so sorry you two have to go through this, Nick... How are you doing?' She asks and he shrugs his shoulders.
'It's funny, no one ever seems to ask that. I don't really know. I'm just trying to, you know, keep things going for Demi's sake.' He replies and Marissa places her free hand on his shoulder.
'You're allowed to grieve as well. It was also your baby.' She says.
'I know but she needs me.' He replies shrugging his shoulders.
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'NICK?' He hears Demi shout from upstairs. Marissa took Willow to the park a little under an hour ago and he's been wrapping presents ever since. Dropping the scissors he rushes upstairs and finds Demi sitting on the bathroom floor wrapped in a towel.
'What's happened?' He asks kneeling down beside her.
'Can you get me some clean underwear and pyjama pants?' She asks and he nods his head.
'Of course I can.' He replies. He leaves the bathroom and she runs her hands over her face.
'Marissa's taken Willow to the park for a little bit.' He says as he returns to the bathroom.
'Okay.' She replies quietly.
'Do you need me to redo the hot water bottle?' He asks noticing the tears filling her eyes.
'No. C-Can you come lie with me or are you busy?' She asks biting her bottom lip as she stares up at him.
'I'm not busy. I'll go change the sheets on the bed and then we can lie down, okay?' He says and she nods her head.
'Thank you.' She replies.
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'Dallas phoned earlier, said she'll drop presents off later this afternoon.' Nick says as Demi cuddles into his side.
'I don't want to see her.' She replies quietly.
'Okay. You don't have to see her, I'll tell her you're sleeping.' He says kissing the top of her head.
'I don't really want to see anyone.' She admits.
'That's fine, you can just stay up here if anyone pops by.' He says.
'Do you mind if I try get some sleep?' She asks and he shakes his head.
'Of course I don't, baby. I'll be right here.' He replies. He keeps his arms wrapped around her tightly as her eyes grow heavy and she eventually falls into a deep sleep.
