Kiss Virgin

Dont pity me

Pure silence.

It was scaring me.

Did I really want to know who was capable of hurting him this badly? Liam was too darn stubborn and full of pride. Guys are human too, for god sakes, they cry. Seeing him fight back the tears killed me because I knew that, through the lies, he was damaged.

His walls were up. 

And it was well guarded.

"Don't push me away, okay. I'm not going anywhere Liam. If you don't want to talk about it, we can just lay here on the road. We don't even have to talk if you don't want to..."

"Just please don't leave..not like this..."

My voice trailed off, near the brink of tears. I couldn't let him see me like this. Mentally yelling at myself, I placed a soft cold hand on his. I couldn't cry, he was the one hurt, not me. All he needed was someone strong while he was at his worst.

His eyes remained focused on my hands, head titled down, he didn't dare look at me.

I took in the silence, inhaling softly, forcing my tears back. 

I leaned away from his sweet embrace, taking a wisp of his smell, and straining my neck to get a better look at him.

I removed my fingers from his, gingerly running a finger across the scar on his knuckle, he  flinched at the sudden contact.

Something inside of me became furious. Why was he so afraid? Constantly fidgeting with his own fingers and flinching when someone puts their hands on him...

This beautiful boy in front of me was filled with so much pain and secrets.

He held everything inside.

It was killing him.

Why didn't I noticed it before?

Liam leaned back on his back, sighing softly, and inhaling the cold air. Without uttering a single word, he looked up at the sky and closed his eyes.

He faintly smiled as a few drops of rain fell on his face.

"I come here a lot. It's my favorite place. " Liam suddenly spoke, his deep soft voice interrupted the quiet sound of rain drops falling on the road around us.

I didn't speak, instead I laid down on the road with him, and placed an arm around his stomach.

Laying down side by side, my head on his chest. It was enough. I didn't have to speak, my actions showed enough. I was gonna let him open up to me in his own time...in his own way.

"It's the one place I could feel at peace
(laughs softly)

...it's stupid but I've been coming here ever since my dad

(pauses)

....my dad passed away. I would walk here during the weekends when I was ten..it would take me all day to get here.."

His voice slowly drifted off, afraid to tell me more.

Wrapping my legs around his and placing my head upon his shoulder, I looked directly at him, smiling softly, giving him the courage to keep talking.

Our faces inches away from each other, he looked at me, returning a faint smile.

"It was tough losing my dad. He was my everything. My mom...we grew apart, she didn't take his death so well... she started...she.."