From their conversation on the phone, she and Alyssa agreed that Alyssa should go to her condo so they could talk. But she did not expect Alyssa to show up with an already empty bottle of beer on her hand and many more unopened ones inside a plastic bag on her other hand.
She invited Alyssa inside with a frown on her face.
Alyssa went immediately to her kitchen to get a can opener, opened a beer, and drank it as if it was water.
"Ly!" she bellowed.
"Oops. Sorry, Besh. You want one?" Alyssa motioned to open another beer but she stopped her.
"What are you doing?" she asked Alyssa worriedly.
Alyssa just looked away before taking another gulp of beer.
"Washing all the pain away with alcohol," Alyssa whispered.
And the pain in Alyssa's voice broke her. She couldn't bear seeing Alyssa like this. She just wanted to see Alyssa smile and be happy again.
She took the bottle away from Alyssa and put it on the kitchen counter. Then, she pulled Alyssa into her, holding Alyssa behind her head so she could cry on her shoulder instead.
Alyssa sobbed.
"Besh, ang sakit kasi, eh. She didn't even talk to me. She walked away from me. With Ara. She chose Ara."
She felt Alyssa's shoulders shake as she talked.
Using her other hand, she rubbed Alyssa's back in circular soothing motion.
Over the past few days, Alyssa has been depressed to the point that she always had to make sure and convince Alyssa to eat properly. Alyssa did not talk much about her problem with Mika that she couldn't believe it's this bad already.
"Bakit ako lang ang nahihirapan, Besh? Bakit siya parang okay lang? Mahal naman niya ako diba?"
"Besh, she probably has her reasons. And I'm sure she loves you."
Just not as much as I love you, Ly. If it were me, you wouldn't be going through this.
"So bakit, Besh? Ganoon ba kalaki ang kasalanan ko?!"
Alyssa moved away from her with anger on her eyes before getting the beer again and finishing it all up. She tried to stop her from opening another one.
"Ly, diba sabi mo hindi ka na pwedeng uminom ng marami?"
She doesn't exactly remember why but she did remember that Alyssa always refused to drink too much. Alyssa doesn't drink at all unless they were with all their other friends. But at this rate, Alyssa will be drunk as hell in minutes.
"Wala naman siyang pakialam, eh."
Mika again? Damn it!
"Well, I care, okay?! I won't have you getting drunk just because of some woman!"
Alyssa's eyes watered again.
"She's not some woman, Besh! She's my girlfriend and she's out there with the woman she used to love before!"
"Besh," she said with forced calmness. She couldn't lose her cool. Not now when Alyssa needs her more. "Alcohol won't solve anything. What you need to do is talk to her."
"But that's just it, Besh! She won't talk to me remember?" Alyssa said while wiping her tears. "So can you please just support me in this because it really fucking hurts, Den."
She believed Alyssa. She could see it in Alyssa's eyes, in her soul, just how much pain she was in. And truth be told, if they weren't preparing for the SEA games then, she probably would have drowned herself in alcohol, too, the moment she found out Alyssa was seeing somebody.
