The Girl in Blue

10- The Girl Worries

Sutton

Between the books in the shelves, I see him sitting at his regular table, typing away at his laptop. His brows are furrowed, like he's thinking very hard about what he's doing on his computer, maybe studying for a tough exam or something. Focused on his screen, Jonah doesn't notice me tip toeing around the library to shelf the loose books. I'm safe within the aisles of the shelves but when I have to switch aisles, I am out in the open.

I have finished this aisle so I'm about to switch to the next one with my cart of books but just as I'm about to step out into the open area of the library, Jonah moves. He goes to take a drink of his Starbucks coffee and I jump back into the safety of the aisle. He doesn't even look this way before he puts his coffee down again on the table and continues to focus on his laptop.

It's been four days since I had lunch with Jonah and totally humiliated myself and it's been a very long four days because it's all that I can think about. I avoid him at all costs when I'm working and so far, I've been successful but I'm not getting my work done as quickly as I know that I should.

My bosses don't realize that because I just stay a little later to get everything done but having to sneak around on the entire floor is both inconvenient and pathetic. I can't help it though, just thinking about the idea of facing Jonah makes me want to vomit and nobody will switch me floors because we're all so used to stocking our own floors and we know where everything is.

I know that everybody else thinks that I'm being ridiculous, they made that very clear at the lake yesterday, and I know that I'm being ridiculous too but like I said, I really can't help it.

It takes me an extra ten minutes today than it usually does to stock the books because I have to keep a constant eye on the back of Jonah's cute head. I don't think that he sees me at all and if he does, he doesn't look like it. He doesn't leave before my shift is over so I have to rush to the elevator without him seeing me. It's kind of right by his table so I really have to be sneaky.

With my empty book cart in tow, I start heading for the elevator, knowing that it's my only option. I can't take the stairs with this cart and I can't make a run for it without looking like a lunatic. I just have to go slowly and silently and hope that Jonah doesn't turn around at all. He's wearing ear phones so he probably won't even notice me passing.

I'm almost there, about to push the elevator 'down' button when I hear somebody call my name. Jonah's deep voice makes me jump in my spot and quickly spin around because although I want to avoid him, there's no way that I can ignore him.

"Hey, Swamp Fox," I greet him as he stands up from his table to join me by the elevators.

He smiles at me very politely and it makes me smile at him just at how purely beautiful his smile is. "I didn't see you around today."

Was he looking for me? Just thinking about it being a possibility makes me blush a little bit. "It was really busy," I lie, pushing the elevator button in desperate need to get the hell out of here before I combust right in front of him. "Gotta keep moving."

"Okay, I'll see you around then?"

I smile at him again but I'm sure that he can tell how nervous he makes me because my smile has to be a really nervous smile. I'm freaking out and I'm being very transparent about it which makes me freak out even more. When the elevator door opens, it feels like a breath of fresh air. "Yeah, I'll see you," I assure him before I'm quickly jamming myself into the elevator to go down and away from him.

When the door shuts, I lean against the wall of the tiny box and take a deep breath. It's really no big deal, I'll get over it. Move on. I've finished shelving the books on that floor but I'm only halfway through my shift and I can't spend the whole time thinking about Jonah. Sure, I embarrassed myself but I'll shake it off eventually and I'll move on.