Secret Love Story #wattys2017 (COMPLETED)

Irrational

           

Shah Rukh Khan-2000

"Shah Rukh? Shah Rukh?" Kajol waves her hand in front of my face. I look at her. Her eyebrows are furrowed and her eyes a wide with her lips slightly parted from both concern and confusion. I can't look at her without seeing him. I can't believe they've kissed. If they've kissed what else have they done? We've both been so busy since she officially moved in. I've been filming, she's been promoting this film with Ajay. We just haven't really been spending any time together and that worries me.
"Kajol I just..." I try to speak but the words just won't formulate. I don't know what I want to say to her. I look down at my hands my fingers knotted together trying to figure out what to say. That's when I notice her hands. I stare at them trying to work out what's different about them but then it dawns on me. I look back at her face feeling so hurt.
"Where's your ring?" I ask watching as Kajol glances down at her right hand before rummaging around in her pockets and then her bag. She looks flustered on her quest for her lost wedding band. I shake my head trying to stop this feeling of disgust and disappointment building inside of me.
"I swear I had it on Shah Rukh," Kajol stammers placing her bag back on the floor, "I swear I was wearing it." I get off the sofa and walk towards our bedroom hearing Kajol following me. I just need to be away from her to try and understand what is happening. I storm into the ensuite and slam the door closed locking it and letting my back hit the hard wood. I slide down the door slowly closing my eyes just listening to my breathing. But then all I can see is Kajol with Ajay doing things together. I don't want to doubt her but I just can't help but wonder... Have they just kissed? I open my eyes but still all I can see is Ajay attacking Kajol's necks with kisses as she runs her hands through his hair evidently enjoying his touch. I throw my arm out trying to destroy anything I can. I knock over the bin, I pull the towels off the railing before standing up and punching the mirror feeling a stinging sensation in my knuckle but when I look at the mirror all I can see is Kajol and Ajay. She wouldn't have done anything... Would she? I punch the mirror again watching the fragments slide out into the sink along with trickles of blood.
"Shah Rukh?" Kajol screams through the door. I know she misses her parents. Sometimes I hear her crying at night but don't know what to do. I know I am all she has left now along with a handful of friends. What if she does have forced feelings for Ajay because she wants her family back? What if I'm not enough anymore? What if she no longer loves me? I'm about to stride towards the door to confront Kajol when I hear voices coming from the lounge area. I unlock the door quietly and edge into the bedroom opening the door a crack and looking out.
"You can't be here," Kajol grumbles trying to push Ajay back out of the apartment. I feel my blood boiling but I can't just burst into the room. I need to see for myself what's really going on. I know deep down I'm being irrational but Kajol is an actress. It'd be easy for her to pretend.
"But we need to talk," Ajay sighs pushing her back. Kajol sighs angrily before turning away. I can see the tear tracks glistening on her face.
"There is nothing to talk about Ajay," Kajol shouts, "I don't like you! I'm sorry if I gave you that impression but I like someone else." Ajay stomps his foot impatiently.
"So that kiss meant nothing to you?" Ajay asks taking a step towards Kajol placing his hand on her back. She spins around pushing him off her like he is some disease.
"'Kiss'?" She yells, "you forced yourself onto me Ajay!" He nods his head his cheeks turning a shade of pink.
"I'm sorry I kissed you. I'm sorry I ever met you," he mumbles placing something on the worktop, "I pulled this off your hand when you tried to leave." With that he walks out of the apartment slamming the door behind him. I watch as Kajol's legs buckle and she falls to her knees letting tears cascade down her cheeks. I know she'd never do anything with Ajay it's just the irrational me talking. This secret relationship makes me crazy. I step out of the bedroom and shuffle towards Kajol. As I approach her she looks up her bottom lip trembling. I bend down and place my hand in hers but then an image of Ajay holding Kajol's hand takes over and I have to drop it. I walk over to the countertop and see her wedding ring shining in the light. So she didn't take it off.
"What have you done to your hand?" Kajol asks standing behind me. I look down at the grazed knuckle, blood still trickling onto my fingers. I clench it gasping at the pain.
"I'll sort the bathroom out," I mumble walking to the cupboard with the first aid kit in it. I grab it before opening it out on the worktop.
"Let me," Kajol tries to take my hand but I pull it away looking at her. I know she's done nothing with Ajay. I know he kissed her but still I can't get images of them out of my head.
"I can do it," I try to smile as Kajol nods her head. Wasn't it her parents who said Kajol and Ajay had chemistry together? I blink my eyes angrily. Maybe I just to sleep...