Handwritten || s.m

3.5

I spend every day of the weekend at Rose's place. It was a nice change from sitting at home doing nothing. She did my makeup, and tried to teach me how to do my own. I was nowhere near as good as she was. All I knew was how to put on mascara. I avoid foundation, too afraid to end up too orange like an oompah loompah. When she wasn't doing my makeup, we were watching Youtube videos of other people doing makeup, trying to teach her different techniques.

"Can you do my makeup for school tomorrow?" I ask her on Sunday evening.

"Sure! You will have to come over early though, I also have to do mine," she puts a fork full of potato salad in her mouth. We were having dinner at hers, sat in front of the tv.

"That's fine, I usually wake up early anyways," I take a mouthful of my own dinner, turning my attention back to the random show playing.

~*~

The next morning, I get up around 6am. It was too difficult to stay in bed, knowing I was going to go to school looking like, well, not me. I wonder what people will think? Maybe they won't recognise me. Maybe I might get compliments. I push that thought to the back of my mind. As if that'll happen. Besides, there is only one person I want to notice me.

I tinker around, as it is too early for me to go knocking on Rose's door. But there really isn't too much to do in my room. After only ten minutes of being out of bed, I get frustrated at how tidy my room is and go to have a shower.

'Maybe I should wash my hair,' I think to myself. 'Give Rose something easier to work with.' So I start to lather shampoo in my hair. It doesn't take me long to wash my hair. Damn me and my efficiency. I get out, dry my hair, and return to my room. The real problem happened when it came to choosing what to wear. Black shirt, black dress, black shirt. I opt for the pink hoodie Rose got me. She'll be happy to see me wearing it. I grab a pair of black leggings and boots, throwing them both on before deciding that it's a good enough time to go over. I send Rose a quick text and head out the door.

Rose is already standing at her front door when I get there. "Let's get to work," she grabs my hand and pulls me up the stairs. She had her hair and makeup already done. I noticed her hair isn't braided, but instead it's curled. She looks very natural, with light pink mattes instead of the bold glitters. She notices me staring. "Thought I'd try something different."

"It suits," I smile and take a seat at her vanity.

"Thanks," she smiles back, pulling out everything she needed. "I have been thinking about what to do for you. I was thinking similar to what I've got on, but gold and peachy tones."

"Hey, you're the expert." I get settled and she starts her work.

As usual, I am amazed at how beautiful she makes me look. It's the right amount of makeup for me. How strange it is to feel confident. It's unknown territory for me. Rose ties up my hair in a messy bun, my usual hairstyle. I wouldn't been disappointed, as I usually do my hair this way and was expecting something more, but it worked. I looked like me, just a bit more done up.

"Guess it is time to go to school," Rose packs up everything and we head off to school. We walk with our arms linked. It was comfortable; having a friend. I felt like a was a person, especially with Rose.

We reached school sooner that I had hoped and that was when the nerves kicked in. How was today really going to go? "Can we hang out today?" I quickly ask Rose as we walk through the front doors.

"Why wouldn't we?"

"Well we haven't really hung out at school for some time. I just wanted to check in case you were busy."

"Oh, fair enough," she answers.

"Is that a yes?" My voice rises an octave. I try to calm myself down so she doesn't see how stressed I am.

"Mmhmm," she lets go of my arm when we reach our lockers. I look around nervously, starting to feel like this was a bad idea. We were early, so the hallway was pretty empty. No one to insult me just yet. "Oh look!" Rose points down the hall to the front door and starts to wave for attention. Out of all the people to walk through those front doors, Jeremy was the last person I would've guessed.

"Hey girls," he comes over to us and does a double take when he sees me. "Woah, Ellie? Is that you under that makeup and pink clothes? Hey!" I punch him in the arm.

"Shut up," I turn my back to him and grab my books out.

"You look good. That's what I meant to say," he puts his hand on my shoulder.

"And I don't usually?"

"Stop it," Rose shuts my locker. "You always look good."

"Thanks," I smile at her. "Now, what are you doing here?" I turn to Jeremy again.

"Just thought I'd stop in to say hi," he taps his foot on the ground. "Hi."

"Hello," Rose and I say at the same time.

"Hi," he says again. We stand in silence. It was very strange to see him here. To see him in general was strange actually. "Well, I really just came to clear out my locker," he admits. "But I have been meaning to catch up with you guys."

"That'd be nice," Rose says. "Hey! Lets fo see Shawn!"

This was the moment I was really waiting for. To go see Shawn. To shoot my shot. We all walk down the hall, and turn the corner. Shawn is standing there, his arm around Jess.

"Oh," I think to myself. 'They're fine.'

"I forgot one of my books," I say before running back to my locker. How could I be so stupid. Building up my confidence, thinking I even have a shot... I don't know if he saw me. I don't know when the next time I can face him, let alone anyone will be...