Andrea Russett
"Hi," I stared into the camera awkwardly, unsure of how to start out the video, "it's been a while, you guys look absolutely stunning, per usual."
I looked down at the ground, then back up at the camera, "this video is going to be different if you can't tell by the title." I stared into oblivion, "I just realized how I always say 'if you cant tell by the title', and I haven't even thought of a title yet. Basically, I'm just assuming that Future Andrea is going to do some futuristic shit, and make a title that confirms whatever the hell this video is about."
I made a weird face and then continued on with the video, "anyways! I'm not in my bedroom in Los Angeles, I'm in my boring bedroom in Arizona. Much smaller, not even cute. Plus the camera is old and it's pretty much a piece of shit, but I'm on house arrest kind of, so this is the best I can get."
"I just wanted to clear up some questions that you guys most likely have about where I've been for the past little while. I've been in a hospital. Dead. Not dead, alive. Well, I was dead, but I got revived. Damn, they just had to revive me! I was this close to escaping debt!" I laughed at my own joke, then continued to speak to the camera, "I'm not sure if Kian addressed what happened or not to you guys, considering I'm kind of not allowed to be on social media, my parents' orders. So I'll fill you in."
"Well you see," I began, thinking back to the day of the wreck, "I was on a cute picnic date with Kian. All was great, the food was great, he was great, I was great, and then on the way back home I guess, we ran into another car. I don't know what the hell happened to Kian, I was comatose for the majority of my hospital visit. And from what I do remember, Kian supposedly was in no sort of life threatening position, so he's fine I guess. I was comatose guys! It's not like the movies, you know? There was no out-of-body experience unfortunately, but I could hear everything going on around me. And may I just say, Kian is a sappy boy!"
I continued on with the video, retailing as much as I could remember.
"I think that my parents will let me have my electronics back soon. Ahh, just you guys wait! I'm going to come back. And I'm going to be better than ever. You guys are great by the way. Thank you for all the sweet shit, I'm sure there was sweet shit. There's always sweet shit. And all you haters who wanted me to die, there's also always haters, fuck you!"
I paused, trying to think of more things to say, "I don't know what Kian has told you guys. I'm not sure how much anybody has told you guys. I'm fine. Kian and I aren't a thing, he's dating Meredith Mickelson I believe. And I'm happy for him. Wait, was it a secret relationship? I think I just spilled a secret, I don't know. Oh well. Anyways, he and I are friends I believe, no bad tension. He is forever somebody who is important to me, and I can't simply forget about him."
