Falling Apart

Chapter 70

Katherine's POV

"Well it's about time." I roll my eyes at David as he walks in the room.

"I was talking to Jenna." His excuse is decent but I'll blame my hormones on why I'm so mad.

"I'm not doing what Ian said. I'm not choosing. I'm not playing his games anymore." I yell out, making it clear to Jenna in the next room that this is not how it's going down.

"I know that, Kath. Just calm down, okay?" David tries to soothe me but it isn't working.

"How can I calm down when I might be forced to actually choose? I mean, Jenna and I are barely becoming friends again, and I can't just give up my baby. I refuse."

"I know, baby. I know." He sits down next to me on the bed. His fingers run through my hair and he pushes head onto his shoulder.

"Why does everything have to be so hard?" I ask him. I think about how everything in my life has led up to this moment, wondering if it's been worth it at all.

"I'm not sure." He kisses my temple. "But you're stronger than this."

"What if I'm not?" A tear escapes me and falls onto David's hand.

"What do you mean?" He shifts away from me until he's sitting in front of me.

"Nevermind." I shake the scary thoughts away.

"No, no, tell me."

I don't want to give in to the thought of Will any more than I've already let myself, but it's eating away at me. "Is this about Will?" David asks, as if reading my thoughts. He's always seemed to be able to do this and I can't tell if that's a good or a bad thing.

"It is, isn't it?" He asks again. I don't answer. David rolls his head back until his neck cracks and he brings it back forward.

"I love you, David. Okay? But this is so hard. I've been in Florida for just over a week and it's already as hard as it was back in South Carolina. This place was supposed to be easier, and a fresh start. But it's been the same and there's no progress between us. You still don't trust me."

"It's hard to trust someone that continues to do the things they promised not to do, Katherine."

His features turn stone cold and I shift uncomfortably on the bed. I get up and walk around the room. "Things just used to be a lot easier, that's all I'm saying." I tell him. I think back to the times when I could lie awake in bed for hours, with my only worry being if Caroline would find out I skipped school that day.

"You mean before you met me, right? Things were easier before you knew me." He retorts.

"No!" I yell at him. "Can you leave yourself out of this for one second, please?" I beg of him. "I'm telling you I miss the days when I wouldn't have to worry about being pregnant, or being kidnapped, or being raped, or having to choose between my friend and my baby, or choosing between two great guys..."

"So he is a great guy." He only listens to about three words of what I have to say. Like always, he picks and chooses what parts he wants to hear and focuses on that. "I'm sorry Katherine, but that's one thing you're going to have to choose." He demands of me. "Me or him?"

I roll my eyes at him and leave the room. I can't take him seriously right now. All I want to do is sleep and get a day away from all of this, and I can't get either. I find Jenna passed out on the couch already, clutching onto the pillow. Sometimes I worry about her, wondering if she really deserved to belong to that mental ward. Sometimes I wonder what would happen if the psychiatrics found her here, and if she'd return to some new building that I'm sure would have better protection from being burned down.