The Words I Never Got To Say (EXO D.O. fanfic)

Chapter 25: The Truth

Chapter Twenty-Five

*Leaving off from last chapter*

Me: Today's the only day I have isn't it.... I'll lay down everything.

D.O.: Go ahead...

I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself down.

Me: D.O.-ah... I don't know what you've heard from Joo Mi and it hurts to hear that I'm the "bad guy" here. The fight was due to a whole misunderstanding, I wanted to solve the problem but I wasn't strong enough. Plus, I think that it would be better for us to go in separate paths. I'm so different from you guys... I've lived such a broken life. I feel like going insane sometimes and can't help but to turn to you guys for help. I tried to ask Hye Jeong for help but she took it the wrong way and told Joo Mi that i was saying bad things about her and her family. I didn't though, I promise...

The reason I'm upset with YOU is because you took me as a joke. I heard you showed Joo Mi all of our texts. I actually trusted you... All my life I've been losing people that I love... It's funny because I still love you guys. I love you guys so much that I have to give you guys up.

I was softly crying. I tried to hold back the small tears but they were out of my control.

D.O.: Who said that I showed Joo Mi the texts between us?

Me: Moon Ji Eemoh said that you did...

D.O.: Well sorry if i did but i don't remember doing that.

Me: That doesn't mean that it didn't happen...

D.O.: If you love us then why don't you just come and talk to us instead of avoiding us?

Me: I just can't, no I don't want to... Because I love you guys so much, I can't have you guys...

D.O.: That makes no sense Jenny...

Me: God made it this way so I have to follow it... My life seemed perfect for once, which was when I had you guys... My life wasn't made to be perfect just as Adam and Eve weren't meant to stay in the Garden Eden forever. You read my diary... It just get worse.

God said that I can't live a perfect life and he's just taking my prayer. He's going to take everything I love so that I'm left with nothing... You wanna know God's trick?

D.O.: What do you mean?

Me: I would be left with nothing.... nothing but him. I would have nothing but God left in my life. God gave me the friends I've prayed forever for but the present he gave me was so great that I got selfish and became attached to it.

D.O.: Hey if God loves you why would he want you to be all alone and have no one else?

Me: What do you mean? I have no one. No one but God...

D.O.: Then ask for forgiveness and get everything back. Try not to get selfish this time Jenny.

Me: There's a reason he did this. He did it so that I could get stronger. Right now, I'm just going to rely on God.

D.O.: Alright then.. I don't know how I'm suppose to help you if you're going to rely everything on God.

Me: I just wanted you to hear me out, that's all I ever asked for D.O.

D.O.: Oh alright.. Is there anything else you want to tell me?

Me: I never turned my back on you guys. I just wanted my voice heard, to be noticed. I hope you know that.

D.O.: Alright..

Me: Promise me that you won't tell our conversation to anyone. This is only between you and me. I'm asking you as my best friend. Please don't tell anyone. I don't care if you hate me or they hate me or what ever but just don't say ANYTHING!