✓ bromance one shots ✎ major editing ✐

Clarity (Niam)

Third Person's POV

Niall and Liam have been dating for over three years now. Niall is helplessly in love with Liam, but he is not so sure of what the latter feels about him anymore. All what Liam seems to want from him is sex, no cuddles no kisses no dates, nothing sweet or romantic; he just wants to have sex, not even make love like he previously insisted on labeling it. Was he just in it for that? The thought alone made Niall's breathing a little heavy.

Niall doesn't thwart Liam's incessant needs in fear of losing him, because he wants to please him, because he simply loves him, but he wants to feel loved too, and lately, he hasn't been feeling that way.

He was not feeling loved by his one and only, and that left an acrimonious taste in his mouth.

He does not want to let go of Liam because he is simply his life- his sunshine. He is holding on to whatever they have left and complying to all of Liam's desires just to ensure that he would be there when he wakes up, that he would stay, that he would still want whatever he does from his . . . body, even if it broke him along the way; he does not want to lose his brown-eyed partner.

'Cause you are the piece of me

I wish I didn't need

Chasing relentlessly

Still fight and I don't know why

If our love is tragedy

Why are you my remedy?

If our love's insanity

Why are you my clarity?

Ironically, all what Liam was trying to do was to please Niall. Lately, he is always finding himself drawing a blank when it comes to ideas that would make the faux blond ebullient, so he resorted to the most popular method of pleasure, sex.

It occurred to him that if he always pleasured Niall by having sex with him, he'd keep him happy and satiated.

Liam was too busy thinking of ways to keep Niall joyous, not realizing that they're osmotically drifting apart, while Niall spent his waking hours trying to figure out where and when did they go wrong because nothing was the same anymore.

That fucking hurt.

Niall can't even remember the last time they properly talked. Formerly, Liam would come back from work, crash down onto Niall's lap and the younger boy's fingers would automatically thread into Liam's soft wafts of hair, and then Liam would spill all the details of his languid day, while Niall intently listened, making Liam's words seem like they were the most interesting thing ever.

Now, they don't even talk anymore, not even during their sexual inter-course. It's always quiet, rushed- almost indifferent- and grim.

Walk on through a red parade

And refuse to make amends

It cuts deep through our ground

And makes us forget all common sense

On a seemingly normal Wednesday evening, Liam came back home earlier than usual. Niall was a bit shocked but managed to force a smile on his face when he greeted his boyfriend- does that term really apply to him anymore?

As per usual, Liam had the now routine thoughts again. He approached Niall with a smirk gracing his features, and Niall's heart dropped into the pit of his stomach because fuck he really didn't want to go through this right now.

Nibbling on his earlobe, Liam whispered into his ear, "Wanna go upstairs?"

Something snapped inside of Niall at the mention of the godforsaken words, and all what he has been wanting to say erupted into a seething invective.

"No, Liam, I do not want to go upstairs! All what we seem to be doing nowadays is going upstairs and having sex! What happened to the bashful and romantic Liam? What happened to my Liam? Are you just in it for the sex, is that what am I now, your fuck-buddy? Do you not love me anymore?" Niall trailed off in a broken whisper. "What have I done? Do you remember the last time you properly kissed me, cuddled me, went on a date with me? The last time you weren't up my ass? Hell, do you realize that's the first time you legitimately spoke to me in months? Just give me a reason Liam, why? Why did you suddenly decide you wanted nothing to do with me but sex? Please tell me why are you doing this because I'm not ready to lose you yet." A single tear cascaded down Niall's pallid cheeks, and it appeared to be a chain reaction because then he was full on sobbing into his hands.

Hold still right before we crash

Cause we both know how this ends

A clock ticks till it breaks your glass

And I drown in you again

Liam didn't fully comprehend the repercussions of his malfeasances until now. He didn't realize that he wasn't pleasing Niall, that he was doing the absolute antonym- hurting him. Unbearable compunction overwhelmed him now that he was aware of what he has been putting Niall through all this time, and the fact that he had referred to himself as his 'fuck-buddy' twisted at his heart brutally because that's the last thing he wanted to portray to his lover. Liam wanted nothing but to be the bearer of happiness in Niall's life, but he chose the wrong type of gesture to attempt to achieve that.

And suddenly, a hefty wave of clairvoyance came crashing down on Liam.

Don't speak as I try to leave

Cause we both know what we'll choose

If you pull then I'll push too deep

And I'll fall right back to you

"Niall, baby no, these were not my intentions at all. I only became this uncontrollable sex machine because I thought that all the kisses, cuddles, and dates weren't sufficient. I didn't stop to think about how you might feel about that and I'm sorry. It was a matter of misconduct on my part. I was irrational, vacuous, and I didn't realize that I was hurting you. All I wanted was for you to be happy, and I'm sorry if my actions conveyed otherwise." Liam apologized for his sophomoric wrongdoings and held his arms out for the still sobbing Niall hesitantly.

And that's all it really took for the lacerations on Niall's heart to heal, and for him to jump right into Liam's arms and engulf him in a much awaited hug.

And damn Liam thought, he only now knew how much he missed this, the feel of Niall in his arms, just them.

And if Niall dragged Liam to their bedroom and demanded him to make love to him this time, nobody had to know.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A•N•

So . . . Niam, what do you think?

Don't forget to please

Vote. Comment. Follow

Thank you lovelies

Xx