Lost Love

[CHRISTMAS UPDATE] Chapter 21: Cut

WARNING: May contain blood in chapter.

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Kuroko's P.O.V: 

I sat there... still on my chair... I watched as he started to grow over her and he made a move. I was kind of happy for him but desperate for a love myself. If I couldn't have Asuka, who could I have... I couldn't love anyone else. I couldn't even be loved by someone. So broken. So tired. I want to give up...

~after school [cuz I'm lazy]~

I walked into the kitchen and decided to cook some eggs and instant noodles. As I was frying the egg, I was burnt a little bit and I ran over to the sink, rinsing my hand. The eggs were a bit burnt and the instant noodles were extremely lumpy. I couldn't do anything... I couldn't to anything right. 

I sat on the ground after I turned off all the fire. I reached down into the drawer and pulled out the sharpest knife I could... I was going into depression and I didn't know what was going to happen. I was dizzy. I was tired. I wanted... to die. To end my life here and now so I don't need to suffer anymore. 

I placed the blade on my wrist and slowly cut it. Blood came running out and I cried. It was more painful than I thought it would be. It was... the blood was running out quickly and my hand became numb. I want to end my life. I used the knife and continued making cuts all the way up to my neck. The blood kept running down my neck and my hands. 

I can kill myself. I just have to cut my neck. Cut it. My hands wouldn't listen to me. I didn't want to die. But I wanted the pain to stop. I took the knife and pointed it towards my throat and I slowly pierced it through my skin. I couldn't... I couldn't breathe. I was suffocating. I wanted to bend down but then the pain continued to grow. 

I dropped the knife on the floor but then it stabbed my leg instead. I held my thigh in pain and cried. I was going to die soon. I was too injured. I was chocking and I spat out some blood. I used my energy to look at the blood. It was red. I was stupid. All blood is red but... this blood... there was something in it... 

"KUROKO!" I heard from a distance but there was so much pain that I lost all my energy. I couldn't even see who came for me. Who called out my name. I looked on the floor again, wanting to pick up something from the blood on the floor. There was something shiny. I wanted to feel it, see it, smell it... What was it?

Her voice echoed in the room but I still couldn't hear properly. I fell down on the floor as I saw a blurry face appear in front of me. She put her hand on my face and the other in my hand. She mumbled somethings... about the police... and help... I held her hand tighter, I didn't want her to call the police. I didn't want to go to jail for trying to commit suicide. Instead... I had a better idea...

I took the knife from the floor and put it closer to my heart. I'll ended here and now. I tried to push it into my chest but with all my force, the knife flew back and hit her instead. I saw something red fly out from her head. 

I-I... The knife j-just hit her...

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Is she badly injured? Is she alright? Where was she-