Bk 2: Hard to love

Baackkk

The next morning I woke up not seeing Terrence in bed beside me. I shifted the spread off me revealing my naked body. Last night was great. It felt like Terrence showed how much he cares about me the whole time during sex, rounds after rounds of making nothing but love making had me worn out. I haven't had sex since my last time with August; that is years ago and Terrence definitely gratified me ❤✨

I took up the T-shirt from across the room and put it on and left the room into the direction of the kitchen which was next to the living room. Surprisingly it was empty. I then left the kitchen and search through until I ended up at the back door that was half open. I stepped out hearing his voice on the phone as he and somebody went back and forth.

I cleared my throat not wanting him to believe I was here for a long time eavesdropping, he turned around and his face lit up from that angry expression he had on.

" You know what Anny I gotta go okay, I'll see you soon when I get home"

And just like that he hang up the phone.
He walked over to me and wrap his arms around my waist pecking me on my lips " Good morning beautiful"

" Is that your wife?" I asked changing the topic.

" Uh... Yeah thats-- that's Anny "

"So I guess she's upset about you not home last night right?"

" Yeah she is.. But I know what to do to calm her down"

We sat around a table that breakfast was already set on

" And what is that exactly?"

" C'mon, can we not talk about her.. This moment is about us okay "

" Whatever Terrence.."

I dug into my pancake with my fork and my knife cutting piece and dipping it into the syrup that was in the middle. I ate not giving Terrence a glance nor a look. Somehow a piece of me felt jealous.. But I shouldn't because I knew about his wife and I knew they do things like these too or even more.

I sat both cutleries down and took in a deep breath and let it out as I chew the last of the pancake that was in my mouth. I held down my head and then heard Terrence voice spoke to me but I just couldn't look up at him or even acknowledge him right now. I believe he sense the sadness be cause he then got up and stood over me.

" Baby?"

I pulled away my hands from his as I wiped the tears from my eyes. That's when I felt his strong arms lifting me from my seat.

" Sade, what's wrong"

" I can't do this Terrence" I said honestly

" Can't do what exactly? Baby talk to me"

" This Terrence!, you.. Me, us.. I just can't"

" Sade please, don't put an end to us at lease not like this" he said in a soft tone.

" Terrence tbh with you.. I'm tired of being people's last choice.. Or that girl somebody might need when something else doesn't go their way.. I'm tired of getting played.. Getting my hopes up that maybe, maybe somebody will finally choose me. I do got feelings.. Feelings niggas tend to always wanna fuck with. And I don't think its going to work out well with you and I. "

I felt much better that I'm able to some of the things I've always kept in out loud.. I was truly tired of getting played and so use to these BS .

" I understand you went through something's in your previous relationship.. I ain't here to judge you nor hurt you.. I'm really feeling you. I don't know what is it I can do or say to make you understand how much I'm feeling you. I ain't gon say love but its near that. You're a good person Sade you ain't deserve to be a single mother growing two spontaneous children. I love the fact that you can hold your own, you're something special and I'll try my best to never slip up.. Okay baby?"

" I hear you.."

" I don't want because of your last relationship with your Looney ass ex boyfriend who doesn't know how to treat a lady, you get scared to try something with someone else"

I barely laughed at his remarks. Even though it was kinda funny.. That's still August he talk'n bout and although we ain't together I hate hearing people calling him out his name or say bad things about him. lool yup .

We finished our breakfast then we cleared the table and bring the dirty dishes in the kitchen where I washed them up.

After that we went back to the bedroom to get ready.

" You showering with me?" Terrence whispered in my ear as I place some toothpaste onto my toothbrush. I smiled and nodded to him. He then went and turn on the water so we could relax for a moment in the tub.

Short one ik.
Sorry for the long wait.
I'm back now.. I think. Lol.

❤❤