Snack Food Hero

Chapter 22: Ms. Frizzle is for Rizzle

Bash fiddled with the rope that bound his hands behind the chair in which he sat. It was tied extremely tight. He saw Rainbow across the room, her face focused; she must be doing the same thing, trying to untie herself from her chair.

"Nice tree house," said Lance. Lance sat straight up in his chair, not fiddling with the rope.

The tree house was actually a tree home for the kids. They slept on bunkbeds along the walls.

Bash could see Ms. Frizzle standing outside the bus through slits in the wood. He asked the room, "Ms. Frizzle smokes?"

"Yes!" said DA. "And it stinks!"

"They left that out of the TV show," said Bash. He watched Ms. Frizzle lean against the bus with one hand in her pocket and the other hand working a cigarette to and from her lips. She let long streams of smoke flow out of her mouth and nose.

"She is supposed to be our role model," said Keesha.

"Ha!" Laughed Arnold. "She'll never be my role model."

"Ms. Frizzle is more like a slave master," said DA. "I try to avoid her."

"You should hear her yell," said Carlos. "It sounds like dying cats!"

"Carlos!" Yelled Arnold, Keesha, and DA.

Carlos laughed. "Well it does."

"So," said Rainbow, "I saw that episode where The Magic School Bus went to the center of the earth, but didn't your class go back to the school after that trip?"

"Yea," said DA. "We completely finished filming the season and went back to live with our families."

"But then," Keesha said, "Ms. Frizzle invited all of us to a reunion for the show. So we all flew back to the studio where we found Ms. Frizzle in the parking lot with the Magic School Bus."

"Yea," said Carlos, "and I was like, 'Yo, Ms. Frizzle, is you for rizzle?'" Carlos fell back on his bed, which was a top bunk, and held his tummy while he laughed.

"Carlos!" Arnold admonished.

"And then she brought us down here," said Keesha. "in the bus. And she said this is home now."

"She's mean!" Said Duncan. Everyone laughed.

"I know we're the ones tied up right now," said Bash, "but you all might as well be tied up. You're all prisoners. You've got this magic bus, so why are you still down here?"

"YOLO" said Lance.

"What?" Asked DA.

"You only live once," said Lance. "There's only one Ms. Frizzle, but there's all of you. You could overpower her."

"No we can't," said Keesha. "Because she takes steroids!"

"What?!" Asked Rainbow. "This is insane! I swear I am in purgatory."

"She wants to be a he," said Carlos. "So she's ... he's ... Miss ... Mister? Frizzle is really strong."

"One time," said DA, she picked up Carlos and Arnold at the same time—"

"—And threw us like ten feet!" Said Carlos.

"Plus, she's got Liz," said Arnold. "That lizard loves Ms. Frizzle and would fight us if we tried to overtake Ms. Frizzle."

"Come on now," said Bash. "You can't be scared of a little lizard.

"It's magical!" Said DA. "It is, it's what makes the bus fly."

"Or turn into a submarine, or become microscopic," said Arnold.

"Anyway," said Keesha, "only Ms. Frizzle can get the lizard to make the bus fly us out of here."

"Since we're all prisoners here," said Bash, "would you untie us?"

"No," said Keesha. "It's too risky".

"I have an idea," Bash said, "that I'll share with you if you untie us. Look, we want to get out of here. You want to get out of here. I know a way."

All the kids walked up close to Bash, their short bodies looming over him as he sat defenseless. Arnold leaned in and asked, "Whatchu talkin' bout, Willis?"