Shivers * WWE Fanfic

44

"Are you sure you want to hang out? We don't have to if you don't want to." Randy says as we're walking to the parking lot.

"Yeah I want to hang out. I just have a lot on my mind." I say bitting the inside of my cheek. The night is cold and a bit windy.

Since yesterday I can't stop thinking of Sasha's words. Every single word that came out of her mouth felt like a knife twisting in my soul. I'm starting to believe it all.

"What's wrong? If I can know." He asks as he unlocks his car. "I don't want to talk about it." I mumble as he opens the passenger door for me.

I get in and seconds later he gets in the drivers seat. "Why not? Keeping things to yourself is not good. It consumes you."

He turns on the car I chuckle. "The last time I talked about what was wrong with me it sucked. I should've kept it to myself and a lot of things would be different now."

"Things happen for a reason. You know?" He asks as he begins driving. I nod my head. He glances at me and I turn my head to the window.

We don't speak the whole drive to the movies. We go by a movie theatre and I sit up looking at him.

"I thought we were watching a movie." He raises his eyebrows and smiles. "Change of plans."

"Why?" I ask suddenly feeling nervous about this change of plans. "Because you have a lot in your mind right now. You wouldn't have paid attention at all also I don't want to waste my money if you're not paying attention."

I look down at my lap and he laughs. "Kidding! I'm kidding Aj." I look up and he's still laughing.

I get a ton of flashbacks of Dean. He would say something like that. He would say "Kidding. I'm kidding".

"You should've seen your face." He says with a grin. "I thought you were serious for a second." He shakes his head no, "I was messing."

"So where are we going then?" He looks at me for a brief second. "It's a surprise."

•••

Randy parks in front of a park. "This is the surprise?" I ask looking at the park. Don't get me wrong parks are nice and all but being here at night is kind of creepy.

"Yeah. We can just chill and talk. It doesn't have to be about what's bothering you. We can just talk and get to know each other."

"Okay." I say unbuckling my seat belt. He smiles and gets out of the car. We walk to a bench and take a seat.

Tonight is full moon and it looks beautiful and bright. If I didn't feel so gloomy and blue I'd be smiling just by looking at it.

"Do you really like Sasha?" I blurt out to Randy. He clears his throat and I feel him looking at me. I'm still looking up though. 

"I thought we were here to know each other. Not to talk about...you know." He murmurs. I look at him, "I want to talk about that."

"I don't want to upset you again." He says. "I know. I just want to know. Can you answer my question?" He seems to hesitate but nods his head.

"I really like her. I think I'm in love with her." He says looking at the ground. I can't help to snicker, "You to hug?"

"What do you mean?" He asks turning his head to face me. "Deans in love with her too." I say sticking my cold hands inside my jacket.

"Oh." He simply says. "What made you fall in love with her?" He takes a few seconds to respond. "I don't know. Sasha is impatient, controlling, mean, but I love her to pieces. We weren't together for a long time but I truly fell for her in those few months we dated."

I press my lips together and he laughs sadly. "Stupid right? How could I have fallen in love in such short period of time?"

"No. It's not stupid." I say quietly. "You fell for Dean too didn't you?" I nod my head slowly. "You know what the sad thing is?"

Is there something more sad than this? "What?" I ask as he looks straight ahead. "I knew she liked him. Ever since he saw you with him I knew she liked him."

"She kept trying to talk to you two. That's why she always stopped and talked when we saw you two. That's why she invited Dean and you to the beach house. I knew she was using me to make him jealous.  I knew it but I still let her use me."

A wave of sadness slowly falls over me. It's like Randy and I are the same person. We were both used. We both knew. And we both liked it. 

"Why do we let people use us?" I ask. Randy sits up straighter and shrugs. "Maybe because its the only affection we receive. We don't think about it as using, we think about it as love. We just want to see that person happy and if that includes them using us that's fine. Because love is selfless. We'd rather see them happy than ourselves."

I swallow the knot that's on my throat. Who knew Randy was so deep? Never in a million years did I think he was.

"That's what sucks. I feel the same way you feel Randy. I feel your pain and sorrow. I feel what you feel." I say as fat tears spill from my eyes.

He scoots closer to me and wipes my tears. "I know I should forget her but I don't want to." He mumbles.

"Me too." I whisper. "We have to though." He says. "How?" I ask as the wind dries my tears. He slowly leans close to me.

I hold my breath not being able to move. He keeps eye contact as he presses his cold lips against mine.

I'm frozen unable to move or think. My brain is still trying to process this. He closes his eyes as he behinds moving his lips.

I slowly start to close mine too.