Dodging Disasters ✔

Chapter Forty-Six

46. Did You Just Make Up A Ship Name?

The only emotion that I feel is happiness as I stand there in the gazebo, my hands in Tyler's hair as I kiss him, not wanting to let go. His fingers dig deep into my hip as he pulls me closer, and I smile against his lips.

His eyes suddenly flutter open and he pulls back, breathless. I frown at him, trying to catch my breath and he tugs at his hair in frustration.

"I'm sorry, Mads. But I can't do this." He says, striding over and shutting the music on his phone.

"What the hell do you mean? I thought you wanted this too, Tyler." I tell him, all of the happiness being replaced by anger and shock.

He sighs as he looks at me, a sadness in his eyes. "I do want this, Mads. But I can't let it happen."

I raise my hands to my sides as I look at him incredulously. "Why not?"

He closes his eyes and exhales, slowly. Once he opens them, he swallows hard before saying. "I'm sorry." And then he walks back down and I watch him pause at the beginning of the narrow path. He turns towards me and bites his lip, staring at the ground as he tries to think of something to say.

I storm towards him and as he opens his mouth to say something, I walk past him and tell him, through gritted teeth. "I don't need you to lead me back. I know the way."

Without glancing behind, I make my way down the narrow path hoping my memory was strong enough to guide me back to the penthouse.

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"Is something wrong between you and Tyler?" Kevin asks me as I gather plates from the kitchen.

The moment that I'd reached the penthouse, all alone, everybody had noticed how I'd run to my room and banged the door shut behind me. I had cried my eyes out after that, only to stop when Tyler had knocked on my door, asking to talk to me. Then all the sadness had left and the anger had settled in as I'd yelled at him to leave me alone.

The others had witnessed the whole argument and I had only opened the door when Khushi came knocking. Her voice had calmed me down, but I wasn't ready to talk about it just yet.

But then Khushi had said something when she noticed my red eyes, when she realised that I was crying. And even though she didn't know why, she managed to make me feel much better.

"You know the meaning of my name, Mads?" She had asked me and after I'd shaken my head, she had smiled. "Remember I told you about the guy who cheated on me with my best friend? And then I was completely devastated and depressed and changed schools. Well, I hadn't told anyone about what had happened to me.

But then my cousins came to visit and I couldn't hide it from them. They sat me down after listening to the whole thing and they asked me this question - What does your name mean? I told them that Khushi means happiness and as I spoke, I realised it myself. The most important thing is happiness, Mads. I was named happiness and there I was, crying over some stupid assholes. And now whenever I'm down, I ask myself the question that my cousins asked me then - What does my name mean? And I have my answer.

Don't let anything ruin your happiness, Mads." She had finished and I had hugged her tight as I thanked her.

And then as I sat on my bed, I realised that she was right - my happiness was above everything else.

And that's why I needed to fix things, but I couldn't do it right away. I was too pissed at Tyler so I tried my best to avoid him; I didn't want to get hurt this way - knowing that I had feelings for Tyler and maybe he did too, but he didn't want anything to happen between us. He acted as if the kiss meant nothing to him, and I was furious because it meant a whole lot to me.