Antichrist [m.h. AU]

Please

Matty.

I was searching all over the place for my keys, stumbling across the kitchen floor slipping on my jacket in the process. Allen chased me around as I panicked needing to clear all this mess up now, in person. Even though I had work in the morning I wanted to be by her side, to let her cry to me about her worries, to let her know that all I said wasn't true. I had to be honest and tell her I slept with Sophie and that all my regrets were spilling out of my brain like a mad man. By the time I got in the car my vision was blurred from the tears threating to leave my eyes. The car roared to life I wiped my runny nose and headed off for the hospital "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry Violet." I said to myself over and over until my head hurt.  My chest felt heavy everything was so vivid right now.

I drove so fast I'm shocked I wasn't pulled over. Arriving at the hospital I burst through the doors not even bothering with the front desk because I knew exactly where she was and how to get there. I was so used to having to see her in the same hospital I knew this place up and down. Forgetting the lift I booked it for the stairs taking each step so fast I almost tripped up them. It was like I started seeing red from the fear of loosing her. It attacked my brain how quickly my mind changed about her when I realized her life was at risk. How her still breathing is so valuable to my life. She's taught me so many things made me feel so many ways I can't let it go because of an argument. Not like this.

I found her room quickly not wanting to knock just twisting the handle and going right in. Even if she was asleep I would stay right there next to her until she wake up. She wasn't asleep by the looks of it. She was busy talking to some brunette bloke who was sitting right next to her bed. They both stopped conversing to look over at what the mess I was. The tears on my face dried up my eyes blood shot. My jacket barely even on my shoulders my shoes not laced. Yet she still managed to look more beautiful than me in nothing but a night gown and wires.

"M-Matty...." Violet said softly almost shocked to see me here. I was more shocked by the boy sitting next to her who seemed so interested in holding her hand.

"Violet I can't do this. I'm sorry I'm so very sorry baby girl. Please let me explain myself." I stayed in the door way leaning against it, my fingers toying with the hem of my jacket. They both looked confused. The nameless green eyed boy stood up suddenly.

"Who are you?" He said almost with venom like he wasn't interested in who I was but wanted approval. He didn't even let me speak to introduce myself. "You're this fuckin Matty bloke?" He spit as if he's heard about me before. Either or good or bad but knowing it's both if the words came from Violet.

"Excuse me who are you exactly?" I asked defending myself steeping up to him even though he was 6'3" and even looked like me.

"Charlie." That's what made my blood boil. The sound of his name made my fist clench balling them at my sides. This was the prick who took that photo of her. Don't get me wrong it was a gorgeous photo her body is damn near perfect but my hands belong on her not his. I saw Violet over his shoulder covering her eyes as if she was crying or didn't want to see what was going to happen next. Instead of trying to pick a fight I clasped my hands together as if I was praying closing my eyes and taking a deep breath.

"Can I have just ten minutes with her?" I asked even though I didn't really need to, he doesn't determine who she can and cannot speak with. Yet I really needed the privacy, the whole reason I came here was to be alone with her, but apparently she's relying on her "good friend" Charlie to comfort her.

"Five." He boomed purposely bonking his shoulder into mine as he left to wait outside. It left me awkwardly standing near the door Violet's eyes not traveling in my direction but to the milky white sheets under her. I didn't really know what to start with, if I should stay out and speak or come sit with her.

"It's only fair if I be honest with you." I started. "And I know I was honest before but now nothing is going to get better unless we communicate..." She still didn't say anything. From the distance I could see her bite her lip and a tear roll off her thick eyelashes. It broke my heart. "After we argued, I went....I went and fucked Sophie as some sort of therapy." I breathed and she made some sort a noise that was resembling a gasp or a cry. "Once I heard your voicemail I felt terrible Viv. It broke my heart knowing I left you in a bad note, went behind your back with another girl while you're suffering. All I wanted to do was make you happy and-"

"Well it isn't working!" She yelled bringing her eyes to mine. They're filled with clear tears making her bright blue eyes glimmer under the light. "You were trying to help me remember my past when you wouldn't even tell me about yours." I had to step closer to her, there's was a strong urge in me to wipe he tears away, kiss her and tell her things were going to be okay. Even though they would probably never be the "I've lived 22 years and lost three of them, all I wanted was to recollect myself and you were willing to help. But when it come to opening doors for you it's like it was locked and nailed shut." Her chest heaved. I came over to the bed sitting where Charlie once was and placed my hand on her cold palm.

"I hope you realize my past isn't much of an effect on yours."

"Apparently your fuck buddy was a big dent in mine." She hissed, pulling her hand away looking away from me.

"Then who the fuck is that?" I pointed to the door where Charlie was on the other side, his ear probably pressed to the door listening in on this. "Be honest because that's what I'm doing."

"He's just a friend!" She curled back into the blankets trying her best to defend herself. "You're a fucking liar Matthew. You told me you and Sophie wouldn't ever be anything ever again yet you slept with her, again."

"And I hate myself for it! Can't you see how badly I want you? Don't you understand that was there for you all the time? You dropped to the ground having a seizure in front of me twice. I was there both times when you woke up. I took you to your first concert, I had sex with you and waited until you felt the time was right. Can't you see I'm falling for you? I've been falling for you since the day we met. I've put you through hell but that doesn't mean I want to lose you to something like this. Not cancer, not an argument."

"Matty I think you should go. Please for me. Let me think things through."