Blue-Eyed Secrets

Chapter 16

Tes

The houses surrounding Skigh's are abandoned and falling apart, nobody will miss them, so this should be easy.  I'm standing in front of the last remnants of my best friend. My goal tonight is to gather anything that I want to keep of Skigh's and then burn the rest away. Ron and Bryant tried to argue that I shouldn't be there when it burns, but I wouldn't feel right with anyone else doing this.

So here we are. Bryant hands me a backpack for what I choose to keep and disappears; probably for another perimeter check. I walk slowly up the front steps, through the living room where we would dance along to our favorite songs, down the hall we used to pretend was a runway and up the stairs to her room. I turn the knob and push the door open.

It's three-thirty in the morning, so there's no light in here. I walk in and flip the light switch. Purple walls and the neatest room you've ever seen, greet me. Skigh never liked messes; everything had to be in its place after being used. She used to scold me all the time for not putting things back. 

I let fingers slide against the walls as I walk through her room. I notice Skigh's vanity is covered in left out make-up and hair supplies. She must've been getting ready when they took her.

It's hard to believe that she's dead. I keep thinking of the next time I'll see her and when I realize I never will; it's as if all the air is being ripped from my body. I'll never see her dopey smile again or her incredible violet hair that she pulled off so well. I take down every picture she has of us and I stuff it in my bag. I take some of the clothes I frequently borrowed, the blanket I knitted for her and did a very bad job at doing so and lastly, I find her sketchbook in her art drawer.

My life is in pieces...who would've though just a few weeks ago, I was throwing temper tantrums over parties. I don't know what to think or what to do anymore. I feel weak and I want to cry, but the tears won't come. I know that sadness surrounds me, though; that's why Bryant can't be around me for too long. I don't think he knows that I know why he's always finding a reason to leave. The problem is that every second he's not with me, I panic. The thought of losing him again is constantly on my mind. I fall back on Skigh's bed and stare at the ceiling.

I don't blame Bryant, I don't want anyone else to be swallowed up by my misery like I am. I'm trying to be more talkative and easier to be around because I need Bryant by my side. It's not easy to do that when it feels like your soul is being sucked into darkness. I wish Skigh was here, she'd be able to comfort me; she wouldn't be able to feel my sadness like everyone else does. Skigh always made me feel better no matter what the situation.

"You ready?" Bryant stands in the doorway with a bag in his hand.

"What's that?" I ask, looking at the bag pointedly.

"I... found some paintings I thought I should save. They are amazing; people should be able to enjoy it." Bryant's eye water. I rush over and take him in my arms and he falls apart.

Tears land, hot on my neck, from Bryant's broken blue eyes. "I'm sorry I'm so weak Tes. I just can't hold it in any longer," Bryant sobs while squeezing me to him. I'm alarmed by his crying, I've never seen him like this.

"Crying doesn't make you weak; it makes you strong. Being able to expel what's hurting you is strong." I tell him quietly in his ear. I'm the one who's weak, I'm being eaten alive by my pain.

"Tes, you are incredible. I am nothing without you and I'm everything that I am because of you. Don't ever leave me, please?"

I'll never leave him, that would be impossible, but I go along with it. "As long as you promise not to leave me."