Struggles ✔

Chapter 32.

Cole's POV

The next day, I snuck out of Lexi's grasp while she was still sleeping. I went downstairs to cook us breakfast. I made some scrambled eggs and bacon. I cut up some fruits for desert and prepared coffee for the both of us. When I was done, I fed Cola and drank my coffee as I waited for Lex to wake up. It didn't take that long actually. A few minutes later, Lex came down. Her hair was wet and she was dressed in a loose tank top and sweat pants.

"Morning" she yawns

"Morning. I made breakfast" I grin

"I see that" she chuckles.

She sits down and I place her plate in front of her. I take my own plate of food and start eating. Lex has improved ,by the way, with her eating habits. She doesn't eat a lot but she eats 3 meals a day. She eats slowly too. Before,she would eat really little and that was for the whole day or she wouldn't even eat at all. I constantly monitor what she eats to make sure that she does eat. I don't care if I have to listen to her talk about how fat she is (which she isn't). I'd rather have that, then have her in the hospital.

"So...about last night." She starts

"Are you sure? I mean I'm willing to wait for you to feel comfortable to talk about it. I'm very impatient but I'll wait for you, don't worry." I say

"I need to get it out..." she sighs as if she really doesn't want to do it.

"Lex...please don't feel like you HAVE to tell me. I can wait." I say

"No...No. I'm ready." She says

"Okay...after breakfast." I say. She nods and we finish our breakfast in silence. Once we finished it, Marie took our plates to the sink and insisted that she washed the dishes. We agreed and went upstairs to my room. We sat down on my bed; Just like when she told me about her parents, she kept running her hand through her hair. I took her hand in mine and she blushed a bit, just like before.

"As you know, I've been bullied since the start of high school. I only had two friends. Jess and Hailey. Hailey moved away and we couldn't keep in touch because my parents won't allow it. So now it was just Jess and I. One day, I was partnered with Josh for a project. Josh was kind and sweet towards me. He was the first guy who wasn't so teasing me and he was the first person since Jess and Hailey to ever be friendly. During the time we did our project, Josh and I grew real close. I developed feelings for him and apparently he felt the same too. A few weeks later, he asked me out. We became a couple and we dated for about 1 year. He was my first everything. Pathetic little me was convinced that I loved him."

"Josh started changing as time passed by...he became more rude. He never told me I was pretty anymore. He became cold and distant. Soon, He started to verbally abuse me too.He would tell me how fat I am. He'd tell me that I should be thankful I have him cause no one else will love me. He told me that I was ugly. It was like he became one of them. One of the bullies. One of my family members."

"I don't know why but even after all that, I never broke up with him. I was so pathetic. I thought he told me these things cause he loves me. I wanted to belive that he still cared for me. I didn't want to let him go...Then one day, I went over to his apartment where he lived by himself. The door was unlocked so I let myself in. I heard grunts coming from his room. I went to go check it out but what happened next was the final straw. I found him in bed...with Jess of all people."

Holy shit.

Jess? As in...her best friend Jess? As in Chase's girlfriend, Jess?

"I was sick to the core. I felt like vomiting. My boyfriend was cheating on me with my best friend. I cleared my throat for them to notice me. When they saw me they immediately covered themselves with a blanket. I yelled at Josh and told him we were over...but Josh had the last word. He chuckled and shook his head at me. He told me that I was nothing but another entertainment. He was just bored and wanted to play a game. He said that no one in the entire world could ever love me. He said that I was a fat ass pig who belonged in the farm. He said that Jess was way better than me in every way. He said that I was a pathetic waste of space, and I believed him. I believe every single thing he said. I ran out of there, crying my eyes out."

"Jess took his side and left me all alone. The bullying got even worse as they heard that Josh left me for my best friend. One day, I asked Jess why she was doing this. She said that it was obvious that Josh was interested in her first. She had a big crush on Josh too but she pitied me because I've never had a boyfriend so she stayed in the side lines. Josh and her grew close though when I was sick and at home. Josh said some sweet words to her and convinced her that he's always liked her. I tried warning her that it won't end well but she got mad and told me off. She was yelling terrible things at me. Because she was my best friend, I believed it. I went home that day...only to be told hat I was adopted."

She wasn't crying. She was shaking,but not crying. Her eyes looked dead and empty. She felt numb. When she told me the story of what happened, I felt like I was actually watching a movie or listening to someone read me a book. She talked like she was reenacting everything. The event was fresh in her mind.

I felt anger towards Josh, Jess, the school, her  adoptive parents and just everyone who hurt her. I can't belive she's been through all this...she's gone through harder things than me.

I felt a hand on my clenched fists. I looked at Lex as she pried my fists open.

"You shouldn't be mad. You had nothing to do with what happened" she said as she plays with my fingers

"I started all the bullying." I said

"The bullying wasn't that big of a deal. The main reason of my pain is my parents and Josh. I never believed anything the bullies said until my parents started saying them." She says "Plus even though you started it, you're making it up for it."

"How?!"  I exclaimed. She responds

"By being there for me. By caring for me and my well being. By making me happy."

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