Don't Let Go ✔ (Editing)

11 - Dinner pt. 2

"The food's really good, Marie," Chris says to her while nodding his head. I roll my eyes as I stared down at the food. Dinner just started, and I already want to leave. I think having me here is pointless, because no matter what he does I won't like him. He can be my Mom's lover or whatever, but absolutely nothing to me.

"Thank you, Chris," she smiled and blushes right after. I continued to sigh softly as I played with my food. After a while of silence, and obvious whispered conversations between my mother and Chris, he asked, "So, Ethan, how's school?"

I cleared my throat and finally looked up to them. I saw my mother's smiling face turned to me, and Chris' annoying one. I bit my bottom lip, scanning my mind for a suitable answer. As much as I don't like him, I like seeing my mom happy, so I won't completely mess this up for her. After thinking, and thinking, and thinking for something to say, I finally answered with, "Good."

"Really? I remember when I was in high school, 'good' was about the last adjective I'd use to describe it," he tried to joke.

"Well maybe you were just unpopular. I actually like my high school experience because I'm simply not like you," I told him with a shrug, staring into his eyes. In my peripheral view, I see my mom's face already going red, and steam coming out of her ears. I really couldn't help myself. Plus, it wasn't even that hurtful. Is he going to cry now?

Chris bit his bottom lip then looked down at his plate, and I glanced at my mom. She gave me that look that basically just wants me to lie in my already dug grave. I'm definitely going to remain grounded for another five hundred years. But it's sort of worth it, you know – bragging rights.

Dinner went by awkwardly and slowly. I ate my food, while sneaking texts underneath the table, and my mother and Chris remained silent, probably thinking about whatever old people think about. At the end of it all, my mom sent me up to my room almost immediately, while she went to walk Chris out – which to me was unnecessary; just leave the same way you came in.

I dived on my bed with my phone in hand, continuing to text a guy I met at a coffee shop. I see him every time I go there and apparently, he had the hots for me, so I thought why not. I'm not really interested in him, but I like fun. The one guy I'm interested in is straight, so I just forget it.

I'm so thankful Ashton is supportive. At first it was a bit awkward when I told him but then it became like any other friendship. We continued to talk like normal after he let my confession sink in. I prayed that he would just happen to be closeted who felt inspired by my coming out, and he kissed me... or something. I don't know, I just wished he would also have a shocking revelation. Unfortunately, he didn't.

"Ethan Alexander Block!" my mother called me as she burst through the door of my room. Her face was literally red and it scared me. I flashed a small smile and I sat up in bed. "Hey, mom..." I know whenever she's angry with me, she would use my full name (which is so extremely nerdy and cliché). My mother stared at me with the most dreadful look. "Ethan, this is pushing the limit."

"I didn't do anything, mom!" I argue.

"You embarrassed me, is what you did. I like Chris and I wanted you to meet him but all you seemed to care about was yourself. Is that really how I grew you up?"

"That's how I learnt to be, mom. Life sucks and the only person I've found worthy of my care is myself," I tell her honestly. She gave me a disappointed look while shaking her head. "The world is a horrible place because more and more people are beginning to think like that. Ethan, this isn't you. This isn't the kid I raised to be so sweet and loving. You're becoming heartless and uncaring, and I can't have that, so you better find that sweet kid again, before I have to find him for you!" that was her last word before she slammed my bedroom door closed.

I instantly threw a pillow at the closed door and groaned. I feel like we're arguing every day now. I don't really mean the things I say (/think) about her, and the next day we'd be normal, but I still don't like the thought of us quarreling that way. I don't know what she wants me to do to change that, honestly.

But because she's right about me being a sweet, loving person, I decided to go to her room. I found her sitting on her bed with her head in her hands, and I felt responsible for that look. I took a seat on her bed next to her and my hand went to her back in what I thought to be a comforting and soothing touch. "Mom, I'm sorry," I say to her softly, "I admit that I was rude, okay, and I was wrong."

"I would totally be willing to..." I bit my bottom lip before saying this, "meet with him again. For real this time."

My mother rose her head and blinked at me, "Really?"

"Yeah, why not?" I shrug. I'm trying to follow what Ashton said by showing her I'm worthy of being free. I feel captive in this place – it's time for me to go out. So many people are asking me out continuously and inviting me to parties, but I can't do shit because I'm trapped here or at the hospital.

Mom took my hand, rubbing her thumb finger in my palm. "I love you, Ethan. I'm so happy you'll be willing to do this."

"I only want you to be happy, mom. I could care less about him," I shrugged

"I wish you would learn..." she sighs then shook her head. I was confused about it all, so I just began to slowly let go of her hand, then I stood up to go back to my room. I don't want to know what she's going to tell me to learn. I'm never going to like Chris, and I'll never support their relationship. I'm only doing this a second time for my mom, who seems to be strangely infatuated with him. I walked to my bed, and plopped down, letting out a weary sigh.

Tonight, was a complete bummer.

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Hi hi Guys! A next chapter would be up in a few minutes! All because I'm feeling really really happy about absolutely nothing!