She Coyote

*31. Relapse

COYOTE
My shift was drawing to a close at the gas station. The days usually were relatively uneventful, yielding no impressive figures emerging to create some enticing catastrophe. I was used to the boredom that surrounded me.

I would people watch, observing the characters that filtered in and out of the station. Mostly biker chicks and their big daddy's stopping in to grab a cheap beer and a pack of smokes while filling up the ole' Harley. I was allowed to sport my piercings here, unlike at the bookstore. No one expects a classy lady waiting to take your money at the register for the pack of Pabst Blue Ribbon you just slapped down onto the counter.

Nothing unusual was occurring, it was a casual morning. The clock ticked away the minutes I had to spend here, and I repeatedly fell back to glancing at the clock every few seconds.

I tapped my fingernails against the counter, my mind absorbed by Jude's words. He really didn't like me. Did I like him? It seemed that I just confessed to it without even acknowledging it myself. My brain was a funny thing.

I peered at my small fingers, reminded of the way he snuck into my grasp, holding my hand for as long as I allowed. That was such a simple moment. So sweet and tender. So pure.

As I lazily traced the outline of models on magazine covers, I heard the bell ding on the front door. I sighed, ready to assist another costumer. I peeked up, expecting only the same routine as always. But that wasn't what I received.

His familiar face wore the same smug expression as it did before, his greasy hair always pushed back. I wanted to disappear, because I knew what this man had done to the person I cared most about in the world.

I was paralyzed. Anthony knew it. He smiled. I couldn't catch my breath.

He stared at me with his snake eyes, glaring into my soul. I tried hard to gulp down the bile rising up in the back of my throat. I felt utter disgust and rage. It had been years since I saw this man. I wanted to never see him again.

He lazily snatched a bag of pretzels off the shelf and sauntered towards the counter, acting as if this were another casual meeting. I couldn't fight the panic submerging me, I was drowning in it. I held in my breath as he spoke, his voice silky and smooth. "Well, well, well. Long time no see." He said.

I remained silent. Images of him hovering overtop me in the dead of the night flashed before my eyes. I felt sick to my stomach. I wanted to cry. I wanted to smash his head against the ground.

He huffed out a deep sigh, leaning on his elbows. "Look, know what you must think of me. The way I treated you before was completely unacceptable."

"You ruined me." I whispered, barely able to hear myself. Tears pricked in my eyes at the memories. Anthony wasn't impressed by my statement.

"I was stressed from your mother's sickness and I took it out on you. I should have known better." He replied cooly. I felt the fury bubble up inside my chest, my fists clenching.

"You act like you hit me once. You, you, you...you destroyed my mental state. You took something from me that I can never get back." As I spoke these words I felt a strong gust of emotions take over me. I felt as if my mother were throwing her arms around me and infusing her strength into me. "You took my mother away. You took my fucking mother away." I gritted my teeth, my eyebrows drawing in.

"What?" He asked, befuddled. "Your mother passed away because of cancer. You can't blame me for her death."

"But I can blame you for sucking the happiness out of her. You were only out to get her money, everyone knew it!" My volume increased with my anger as I rounded the counter, my finger pointed directly at his slimy, insect-looking face.