She Coyote

*43. Brothers, until death

JASPER
13
Jude gripped the vodka from off the top shelf of the kitchen, while his friend, who had failed to introduce himself to me and remained nameless, was laughing down from his seat at the table. I rolled my eyes as I leaned in the doorway, crossing my arms over my chest. "Dad's gonna kick your ass," I told him in a very matter-of-fact voice. Jude chuckled and shrugged, tossing the bottle down to his friend, who caught it with two very small hands.

"What's new?" He joked and hopped off the chair he was standing on. He kicked it back into place beside the kitchen table, then grabbed his pack of smokes and dropped them into his shirt pocket.

"We won't be gone long," Beth reassured me from her spot next to me, placing a hand on my shoulder. I moved away from her touch, sighing.

"I'm not a little kid, I don't need you to treat me like one," I nearly hissed at her. She backed away with an expression that read, "at least I tried."

Jude poked my shoulder so I leaned towards his direction. His eyebrows were drawn. "You wanna keep talking to her like that?" I didn't respond, I only stared at the floor with my arms crossed. He continued, "and last time I checked thirteen is still a kid, so you can quit acting like you're the same age as us."

"Jude, chill out, he's your brother," the guy from behind us called out in a groggy voice. I hated the fact some stranger felt the need to defend me when I was perfectly capable of doing it myself.

"So what? Just because you're eighteen doesn't make you an adult." I retorted with just as much venom in my tone.

"Yeah? Think you know more than me? Huh?" I hated the fact he had to literally bend down to be eye height with me. "So? How much is a half a gram of heroin worth? You know that? If you wanted to go buy some smack right now, how much would you need to bring?"

"That doesn't mean anything. I bet you don't even know." I huffed and turned my face away to conceal the blush that creeped onto my full cheeks.

He was quiet for a second and I caught at the last second him exchanging glances with Beth. That was weird. He recovered quickly and stood up straight. "Yeah. I'll be back in a few hours. If you need me just call Beth's place." He slapped a hand against my shoulder before rustling up my hair and striding past me, his two companions following suit.

I hated being home alone. My mom was away at her sister's with Jen for the next few days, which meant Jude was my automatic babysitter. Which really meant him ditching me every chance he could to go get shitfaced or whatever it is he did. I guess I could of just told him I wanted him to stay, but he would have been bored just hanging out with me. Sure, we could be around each other, but we never really hung out, just us two. I would never tell him this, but I always had this slight feeling that he was jealous of dad's and mine relationship. I didn't know why dad didnt like him, but it was obvious. And it was even more obvious how much it affected Jude, even though he tried everything in his power to cover it up.

I remembered overhearing a conversation, actually an argument is more appropriate of a description, between them. Dad was screaming at Jude for finding condoms in his room and Jude was screaming back that dad shouldn't of been snooping in the first place.

"You have no reason to be going through my shit anyways!"

"Don't swear at me, young man. You are out of control!"

"Out of control for what? I have a girlfriend, what the fuck do you expect?"

"Judas James, if you curse at me one more time—"

"What? You'll yell at me some more? Seems like that's really been working."

I remembered hearing something, a grunt, then watching Jude's back hitting hard against his door holding, his hand cupping his shoulder. I knew deep down that my father was abusive, but I never admitted it to myself. He never touched me or yelled at me or especially Jen. He took out all his rage on his first born, and I'll never understand why.