Just As I Am

Chapter 18

A/N: Sorry for the wait, fans! I just started a new job and I haven't had much time to write anything. I Hope you like the chapter! I tried to make it nice and long just for you! ~Key

Isaiah's Pov

"What is the problem, Zay? I'm tired of seeing you moping around! Talk to me. Tell me what's bothering you." Anthony said as he walked into the den.

I was stretched out on the couch watching a college basketball game. It was a sunny Saturday afternoon, and even though there were plenty of things I could do, there was nothing that I wanted to do. That's not completely true. I wanted to spend time with Jazzy, but I knew that wasn't going to happen. Things were better than when we weren't talking, but not by much. It was nothing like it used to be. I now saw why everyone thought we were more than friends, because now that we actually were just friends, there was a huge difference. We didn't stay up talking on the phone anymore, and she didn't snuggle into my side when we watched movies like she used to. I didn't realize how close we were until we weren't anymore, and I missed that closeness like crazy!

"I'm good, Ant." I replied. I wasn't, but I didn't feel like talking about my relationship issues.

"You know I don't believe that." He said, pushing my legs over and sitting on the couch next to me. "So tell me wassup."

I looked at him for a moment, contemplating whether or not to ask his advice. I hadn't given up hope, but I didn't know what I could do to make her mine without being a hater. How did that Trey Songz Can't Help But Wait song go?

And I don’t wanna come between you and your man
Even though I know I treat you better than he can

"It's about Jasmine, right?" He asked. I didn’t respond, so after a brief pause, he continued talking. “You know, you had the biggest crush on her when you were little. Only back then, you didn’t know how to express that. So instead of being nice to her, you would pull her hair and call her names.” He smiled at the memory.

I vaguely remembered her bright red face chasing after me for calling her “big lip Jazzy”. I started smiling, but quickly stopped. Thinking a happy thought about Jasmine only made me realize how much I wanted to be with her. This was driving me crazy, thinking about that girl so much. I would just tell her how I felt, but she couldn’t keep Dashawn’s name out of her mouth long enough for me to say anything.

“The point I’m trying to make is, maybe you’re doing the same thing you did when you were seven.” He finished.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, Ant.” I said weakly. Was I really that transparent? I mean, if everyone could see through me so easily, Jasmine should know it too. Right?

“I’m not going to bug you about it, Isaiah, but I just want you to know that you can talk to me. I know what it’s like to want to be with someone you can’t have.” He got up to leave but I stopped him.

“Ant, wait! Who are you talking about?” I asked. Anthony had been dating Keri for a year now, and I thought things were going great between them. If there was someone else, he’d never brought them around or even mentioned them.

“My best friend.” He answered quietly.

“Mia?” I couldn’t believe it; Anthony wanted to be with Mia? It was almost incomprehensible. Then again, Mia was a very beautiful woman, both inside and out. “You want to be with Mia?”

“Wanted. There was a time when I thought she deserved more than she was getting, and I thought that I could be the one who would treat her better.” He sat down on the arm of the love seat. Better than Trey? I didn’t think anyone could do better than Tremaine. He loved Mia more than anything, and she loved him just as much. Hadn’t they always been together?

“But what about Trey?” I asked.

“Not every relationship is always perfect, Isaiah. Besides, it was a very long time ago; I got over it because it was just infatuation. I wasn’t willing to risk my friendship over a silly little crush.”