The Alpha's Little Nerd

Thirty

~Zane's POV~

I can't pinpoint my exact feelings. The thought of my little baby in her stomach made me feel happy, but having her go through all that pain? Not so much. We watched the test for a few minutes before she turned it upside down and turned herself around.

"I can't just keep staring at it." She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"Hey, it's okay. It's going to be okay." Her eyes snapped open and she glared at me.

"You're acting like you know for sure that it's true. That I'm- I'm pregnant." She snapped. "Do you know? For sure? Do you know?" I shook my head and looked down at her stomach again. "A-stop looking at my-"

"Listen, Devina. I know you're scared. So am I, but I can't tell you what you want to know. That little test can though. So let's just look at it and figure everything out later." She hung her head in shame and nodded. I wrapped my arms around her waist and peered over her shoulder as she picked up the test. She sucked in a deep breath. "What does that mean?" I frantically asked but she just kept looking at the test. "Sunshine what does that mean?" She probably would have answered, but I was too impatient so I rushed to the box and searched for the instructions. There on the box was everything I needed to know. I sucked in a deep breath too and closed my eyes. My heart was still thumping, unable to slow its pace to a steady beat.

"Are you- are you mad?" She softly asked making my eyes snap open.

"What? No Sunshine I would never be mad over something like this." I could tell by her face that this wasn't a good enough response.

"Do you want kids?" She continued. I do. I want to wake up in the middle of the night to the sound of our little baby crying for attention. Crying for us. I want to see them outside playing with other pack kids. I want to watch them grow up and live happy lives. I smiled as I thought of a little version of Devina, I have a feeling we would have a daughter. Maybe that's just because I want one. I want a son too though, I'll take whatever she gives me. Gives us.

"Later, yes." She nodded and looked away. "I want a family with you. But not now. I can't stand the thought of you being in so much pain because of me. I'm sorry I scared you." She put the test down and fumbled into my arms.

"I told you I wasn't pregnant. I'm on my period." We both laughed for a few moments.

"I just wanted to be sure." She nodded and stood on her tippy toes, kissing my cheek.

"If I were, we would keep it." She softly spoke making me grin.

"Really?" I sounded like a little kid being told by his parents that the stray dog they found can be apart of their family forever. She giggled and nodded.

"I don't think I would be able to forgive myself for killing it or just giving it up without trying." I picked her up and spun her around.

"I love you. So much." I crashed my lips onto hers and faintly heard her mumble it back. "Spaghetti?" I pulled back a little and she smacked my arm.

"How many times do I have to tell you? I'm on my period!" I strung out and ohhhhh. Then laughed.

"I don't really care...." I trailed off.

"You're disgusting. Just wait a few more days. Can you do that?" I frowned then nodded.

"You know, you can't get pregnant on your period. Right?" She thought about this then her face turned red.

"I'm not sure how that works." She softly spoke. "Gosh you're so-" Devina looked around the room, making sure I one was there then whispered the last part. "Horny." I burst out into laughter and so did she.

"Only for you babe." Her eyes turned a little darker and she looked away, her face hardening. "You okay?" I leveled my eyes with her but she just looked away.

"Only for me." She repeated making my heart clench.

"You do want to be exclusive right?" I slowly asked. The thought of her with another man made me sick.

"Yeah," She looked back at my face with a pained expression on her beautiful face. "But," That horrid word. That simple, short word can ruin so many conversations and lives. "What about your other mate?" My heart wasn't having any trouble slowing down now. It completely stopped.

"What about her?" I finally asked making her glare at me again.

"What do you think Zane? You haven't even told me anything about her. You guys could still be mates for all I know!" I took her hands in mine and made her look into my eyes.

"She's not my mate Devina. You are." She pulled out of my grasp and stepped back.

"Then explain everything to me. Don't you think I deserve that much?" My eyes fluttered close as I took a deep breath.

"You deserve everything Devina. Everything good in life. That's why I don't want you to know about this." She shook her head and walked towards the bathroom door, but before leaving she turned around.

"You can't protect me from everything Zane. It's impossible and inevitable." She opened the door and was about to walk out but I stopped her.

"I know. God, you don't know how much I know that. I wish it wasn't true. I wish I could protect you. That's my biggest wish in life." She pleaded me with her crystal blue eyes. "I was only sixteen. So was she. The first time I saw her, I didn't really feel anything. Not like when I first saw you. She wasn't a werewolf either. She was a witch. Not a very powerful one, but she knew how to do some cool things. Once we started talking and hanging out, I realized she was my mate. All of a sudden I felt so close to her. Like I could share everything with her. We spent every second of every hour together. Talked about the future and shit like that. Then she just left. She told me that she wanted to see the world. That she didn't want to be with me anymore. This was all before I was the alpha, I used to just be a rouge. Everyone was, I was the first to start a pack. But that was later. Anyways, she said she didn't want someone with no purpose in life. So she rejected me. I wasn't supposed to survive after that but here I am today." I threw my arms up in the air and faked a smile before continuing. "Then I started my own pack and because I survived my mate rejecting me, people feared me. After fifty years, The Crescent Moon pack was the strongest pack in America. Then after a hundred, it was the number one most feared pack." This was all true. I was the first alpha ever. Automatically, people pretty much bowed down to me. The only emotion I saw in their eyes was fear. People outside of my pack received no mercy. Before Devina, that mercy wasn't common inside of the pack either. "So I guess, in the end, it all worked out. Without any of that happening, I probably wouldn't have met you. And damn, I am so glad I met you Sunshine." She just stood there, completely shocked. "That was a while ago though," I added, trying to get her to say something.

"What's her name?" I ducked in a deep breath again.

"April. Her name was April."

"I-I don't understand." She finally whispered making me furrow my brows.

"Understand what Sunshine?" I took a few steps towards her and brushed a golden strand of hair out of her face. She moved back and looked away.

"I'm not-" She glanced up at the ceiling and blinked a few times. "You shouldn't be with me. I'm not good enough for this. For you. I'm just ordinary." My fists clenched as she spoke how she felt about herself.

"Devina. You're anything but ordinary. You're beautiful and so kind. God put us together for a reason. It wasn't an accident like I believe April was. This is meant to believe. I love you. I love you so much. You're my little sunshine." Both of our eyes teared up.

"I love you too." She looked back at me and crashed her lips on mine. "You're my alpha." She nipped at my earlobe.