Calm as still water

Starting over

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"Carl! It's time for breakfast!" The boys mother called up the stairs to him. The boy had short, well cut brown hair and blue eyes. He looked to be 9 or 10 years old. The boys father came in the room and smiled at the boy. "Ready to eat?" The boy set down his comic book. "Is it pancakes again?" His father laughed. "You know it is.. every Sunday, Carl, every Sunday." Carl groaned. The boys father ruffled his sons hair. "We're the kind of family that's gonna eat pancakes on Sundays, whether we like it or not." Carl got on his feet and went down to the kitchen with his father. The boys mother stood there with her apron on, she had just finished setting the table. She smiled at her son and husband with such affection.

During breakfast, Carl's mother and father had a couple arguments. This was starting to happen a lot lately. Carl didn't understand why they were fighting, but he didn't like it. It was always something about dad not understanding, or how they needed to make sure they had enough money for bills. But his dad says he can handle it, and he does. And then his mom gets upset that he's never around enough.

After dinner, Carl trailed after his father up the stairs to his parents bedroom.. Which was two doors down from his.

"Hey, dad?" Carl said as he stood awkwardly in the door way. "Yes?" His father set down his sheriffs jacket on top of his bed.

"I- I don't see why mom has to argue with you all the time.. My best friend in class, his parents got a divorce and his dad left.. And I don't want you to leave." Carl said this all as he stared his father in the eyes, trying his best not to shed a tear even though he felt like crying at the thought of his dad leaving.

His father walked towards him and brought him in his arms for a hug. "Carl, I'm not going to leave you and your mother, ever. Mom... She just, she doesn't understand sometimes.. What it takes to be the man of the house." His father let go of him and looked at his face with an approving look. "You're gonna be the man of the house some day, and you might have to do things your wife doesn't understand in order to provide for her, like working all the time.. Like I do."

Carl thought about what his father said for a moment and then scrunched up his face. "Ew, I don't want a wife." His father laughed and patted him on the back. "You will fall in love with someone some day, bud."

Carl

It was a nice day to be outside farming, if you're into that kind of thing. Carl wasn't. In fact, he hated it. His father, Rick, was feeding the pigs while he was getting water from the bucket they had in the courtyard.

About a year and a half had passed since the outbreak, Carl figured he was about 16 by now. His hair was getting so long he has to push it out of his eyes. He wore a plain gray t shirt and a pair of dirty blue jeans. Carl had his fathers sheriffs hat that he normally wore, but he couldn't wear it farming. Now that would be laughable.

Carl's mom, Lori, walked up to Carl as he was heading down to the pig pens to meet up with his dad. She was holding her stomach as she walked. She was huge! She was going to be having his baby brother or sister any day now.

"My little farmer." Lori said as she placed her hand on her sons cheek and smiled affectionately at him.

"Don't call me that." Carl felt his cheeks get red. Lori laughed and pinched his cheek. "We're gonna be referring to you as 'big brother' soon enough." Carl straightened up when his mother said that, and wore a proud face. "Now get going, your fathers waiting for you." Lori patted his head and watched Carl walk towards the pig pens.

 Rick was digging up soil and worms when Carl walked up to him, "I got the water." Carl stated as he knelt down to start helping his father dig. "Thanks bud." 

Their relationship had changed a lot since the outbreak. There was a point in time where Carl believed his father was dead. His father was in a coma for about a month and a half.. Carl and his mother, and his father's best friend, Shane, all left their hometown to go to Atlanta where they heard there was a safe zone. They met people on the highway they were waiting at and all decided it best if they stuck together. Once they made camp, some of the group decided to go into the city and get supplies. When they came back, a miracle happened, Carl's father stood before him.. he woke up from his coma, he found them! He didn't even know about the dead rising, but he survived them. In Carl's eyes, Rick was a superhero. 

But that was a long time ago, Carl didn't know what Rick was anymore. A leader? A father? His father used to be able to do anything, and now it seemed like he was slipping.. something just wasn't right anymore.

A year ago, Carl was taught how to handle a gun after he had accidentally been shot by someone tracking a deer. But it had been a month since Carl had been allowed his gun. His mother thought it best that Carl didn't have the gun on him anymore because they were safe inside the prison walls. But she didn't understand, they weren't safe. Safe isn't a word you can use anymore. 

Carl looked over to where the walkers were piling up against the outer walls of the prison. "So, they only took out one cluster yesterday, they're probably going to need more people today.. Maybe we could help." he nodded over to the fence, hoping Rick would at least think about it. It had also been a month since Rick had used his gun. He'd been preoccupying himself with farming duties.. "I got other plans, involving dirt and cucumbers.. keeping the people fed." Rick said and gave Carl a small smile. "Well, if you don't want to maybe I could.. could I?" Carl picked up on the fact that his dad said 'I' and not 'we'... maybe he was finally going to give Carl another chance to prove himself! "We have other plans.. Is what I should of said." Rick picked up his bucket of dirt and worms and started for the pen. 

Of course, they had other plans. It was always "Carl, help your mom with chores." "Carl, come help me feed the pigs." "Carl, go read your comics." Why couldn't he help keep watch, or help clear the perimeter? How come he couldn't go out for runs with Daryl and Glenn and Maggie? He was a good shot. He could contribute to the group, just because he was the youngest didn't mean he wasn't capable of helping out. 

"Dad, sorry... I've been trying." Carl said to Rick hoping he didn't disappoint his father in any way. "Yeah, I know.. I'm proud." Carl glowed with pride for a moment and then braced himself, "Dad.. when can I have my gun back?" Rick looked at him for a moment with a blank face and then poured the dirt and soil into the pig's food bucket. "The worms will give them some extra protein." 

Before Carl could say anymore on the subject, a scream from the courtyard had Rick and Carl stop dead in their tracks. A woman's scream. Lori's scream.