Calm as still water

I did what I had to do (part one)

Carl

The world was falling apart around him and he didn't know what to do.

He cried until the sun went down and he sat in silence for what seemed like hours. Carl knew Arya kept checking up on him, he could feel her presence.

He didn't get why she cared about him all of a sudden. Carl wanted to leave. He wanted to be as far away from Arya and his dad as possible. Tonight he could try leaving when they fell asleep.. Carl assumed his father was still a crying mess, sitting on the ground.

"What a disappointment." Carl thought bitterly.

It wasn't fair that Judith was dead.. Or maybe it was. Maybe it was fair that she didn't get to live in this cruel world.

"You're going to beat this world." His mothers words lingered in the back of his head.

It wasn't fair that the world took her away. She kept his father together, now his father would have nothing.. Nothing but him. A son who can't stand to bear the sight of his face. Carl would be better off without him.

"Carl?" Arya asked wearily, standing just behind him.

"What." Carl answered solemnly. He was in no mood to talk, he just wanted to sit here until all the pain was gone.

"We have to find shelter, your dad.. He uh, he was pretty badly injured and if we don't get him cleaned up as best as we can, he could get infections."

Carl rolled his eyes but she either didn't notice or didn't say anything.

"I'm sure he'll be fine. Officer Rick Grimes survived the apocalypse after waking up from a coma and found his family. Didn't anyone tell you that story?"

"Carl, he's not going to get better if we sit around and do nothing.. We need to find a house to raid for supplies and hold out there for a night." Arya said getting angry now.

Carl could tell she was getting angry by the way she raised her voice just the littlest bit, and that pleased him. He knew he shouldn't feel that way but he wanted everyone around him to feel like he did, to feel like their world is crashing and burning.

"I don't care." Carl said shortly.

Arya sounded like she was going to say something but she stormed off instead.

Carl stood up and looked around him, it was dark and quiet, while the air had a slight chill to it. The backyard he was in was fenced in. He turned around once more to make sure Arya wasn't still watching him and he jumped over the fence.

He didn't need anyone anymore.