Calm as still water

Don't let the world spoil you

Carl

Carl paced the cell block.

He was anxiously waiting for the arrival of his new brother or sister.. He didn't think he would ever get a sibling, considering everything that's happened.

"Carl," Rick motioned for him to come in the room.

"No more kids' stuff." His fathers voice echoed in his mind.

When Carl walked in the cell, he saw his mother sleeping on the cot. She looked so weak, so fragile.. Carl shuddered at the thought of her being this vulnerable, what if something happened and they needed to get out quickly?

Nothing would happen, his dad would make sure they would be okay even if something did happen.

Carl turned towards Hershel, the man holding his baby brother or sister. Hershel had saved Carl's life when he got shot. It was an accident. But the group had warmed up to the Greene's, and they were apart of the family now.

"You ready to say hello to your baby sister, Carl?" Hershel smiled at him and handed him his sister.

A sister. She had the same nose as he did, that was for sure.

Just then he made a promise to himself that he would put his all into keeping her safe.

Holding his baby sister was an experience like no other. After everything they had been through, after all the people they lost, she was here. She was real. She was the light at the end of their tunnel, their hope.

***
Later that day, everyone had gathered in the cell block to discuss going out for a run.

"We can go to that place I was telling you about." Daryl said picking his nails while looking at Rick.

"Rick shouldn't go anywhere, he needs to stay here with Lori and the baby." Carol piped in.

"Let me go, I can be there and back. No problems and I'll be quick." Glenn stated.

"If you go, I'm coming with you." Maggie said putting her hand on Glenn's.

"I can go with you guys, I can help." Carl spoke up.

Everyone turned to look at Carl, and then they turned to Rick.

They were all going out on a run for his mom and sister. He wanted to help. It wasn't like he was a little kid anymore.

"You're going to stay here and sort out the food with Beth, that's what you're doing." Rick said, his voice full of authority.

Of course he wasn't allowed to go.

"Dad, I can help! If you would just give me my gun back-"

"Carl, I don't want to hear another word about it. You're not going."

Carl stormed off.

When was his dad going to stop treating him like he was still a little kid? It was his moms idea in the first place that his gun got taken away from him, she said since we were secure place that he didn't need to carry around a gun.

Carl thought that was bullshit.

They were never safe! He should have his gun, just incase he needed it.

Shane would have agreed with him. Carl thought bitterly.

"Carl, slow down!" Rick said from behind him.

Carl stopped in his tracks and rolled his eyes.

Just what he needed, a lecture.

"What?" Carl asked not turning around to face his father.

Rick sighed. "Look, I know you're mad.. But I don't think you're ready to go out for runs and you know your mom wouldn't allow it."

Why wasn't he ready? What did he have to do to prove himself?

"And besides, Glenn and Maggie will be in and out, they shouldn't have to worry about keeping an eye on you out there."

Because that's what Carl was, someone to be watched 24.7.. like a child.

When Carl and his father had a talk back at the Greene's house, Rick had handed Carl a gun and said 'no more kids' stuff.' How can he say that and then still treat him like a kid?

"I can handle myself." Carl said defiantly.

"You may think you can, bud.. But you can't, and deep down I think you know that."

Carl walked away from his father then and continued walking down the hall, he found himself standing in front of the cell his mom and sister were in. He sucked in a breath and walked in.

When he walked in, he didn't expect to see his mom awake.. but there she was, smiling at him.

He looked in the corner of the room and saw Beth holding his little sister, talking to Hershel. Carl turned back to his mom and returned the smile. He was glad to see his mom was doing better.. maybe he could convince her he was ready for more responsibility, and she could convince his dad.

"Hey mom. How are you feeling?" Carl sat down beside his mother.

"Still have to rest, but I'll be up and moving in no time. How are you feeling, you look upset."

Carl breathed a laugh. "I'm just sick of being treated like a kid. I'm like 16 now. I know how to use a gun, Shane taught me himself!" Carl noted the look in his mothers eyes when he mentioned Shane. "You and dad won't even let me carry around a gun, what if I needed it? What if it came down to it and I had to protect her?" Carl motioned towards his baby sister.

His mother looked at him for a moment and placed her hand on his cheek. "Honey, I know you want to help protect us, but that's why we have your father, Daryl, Glenn, and Maggie. Once I'm feeling better, I'm going to get in more shooting practice and help out too. Why put your life on the line when we can avoid it?"

"Because mom, I need to be able to defend myself! What if something happened and we had to run? We always run!"

Carl felt like crying. No one understood him, or maybe they just didn't care.

He was about to say something else until he realized his mother had started to cry.

"You're gonna be fine. You are going to beat this world, I know you will. You are smart, and you are strong, and you are so brave, and I love you. You gotta do what's right, baby. Promise me you will always do what's right. It's so easy to do the wrong thing in this world. So, if it feels wrong don't do it, alright? If it feels easy don't do it, don't let this world spoil you. You're so good, my sweet boy. Best thing I ever did, I love you, I love you. My sweet, sweet, boy I love you."

Lori was holding Carl in her arms while Carl sat stunned. He didn't know why she was crying and saying these things, but he felt comforted by the fact that she had said them.

"I-I love you too, mom. I promise, I'll always do the right thing."

Lori dried her eyes and giggled to herself. "Sorry, Carl, I guess I'm still a little emotional. You're growing up so fast-"

Carl stopped her before she started crying again, "mom, it's okay."

"I'll talk to your father about letting you help out a bit more, we can slowly work up to you getting your gun back, okay?"

This shocked Carl even more.

"Okay. I'll show you guys I'm ready for this responsibility."