No One is Happy with This (Undertale)

2 ~ Detective Frisk

To be honest, you're a little nervous about this.

Because yes, Sans is your friend. You trust Sans.

But...

But he kinda frightens you. He knows things, things he shouldn't remember. And... just because he's lazy, you know, doesn't mean he's weak.

And sometimes, you have the distinct impression that he would rather not be smiling.

And it makes you wonder. How strong is Sans, and how does he remember?

And Papyrus. Sweet, innocent Papyrus. You never did see his "special attack," no matter how many times you fought him. And for all his naivety, he's unnaturally adept at recognizing people's negative emotions- and at placating the particularly miserable ones.

This too, makes you wonder. What sort of history does Papyrus have with depression, and how come he seems so used to handling it in other people?

And who, who was their dad, that he's nowhere to be found and neither of his sons remember him?

Where did Sans and Papyrus come from?

Today, and for as long as you need to be, you are not Frisk. You are Detective Dreemur, famous international private investigator. You have taken the baffling case of the skelebros and their history.

Yes, this summer, you have been tasked with cracking this case, and you are determined to do so.

With that, you yawn, stretch, and sit up in bed. Looking at your alarm clock, you see it's nearly 9:45 AM.

Flowey, in his flower pot, is glaring at the clock. At 9:46 every morning this summer, he has woken you up exactly then by screaming at you. He's not too happy about being stuck in a flower pot.

But I tried to warn him. You reason.

It's true. After the Barrier was broken and Asriel became Flowey again, he realized that there were millions of human Souls on the surface. All he had to do was kill a few people to get a few Souls. Luckily, each of the three times he tried, he was stopped, and on the third time, he was caught and put in the flower pot.

Now, it might have seemed strange that this attempted-murderer was left in the care of a child, but you know Flowey better than anyone.

And, according to him, you're "the  only person who's fun anymore."

... But he certainly doesn't look like he's having fun when, at 9:46 exactly, he turns around, intent on startling you awake, only to find you're already awake.

You smile at him. "Good morning, Flowey!"

He scowls. "Stop being so happy, Frisk. It's disgusting."

You just smile at him as you climb out of bed. "Do you know what I'm going to do today?"

"No, and I don't want to, but I assume you're gonna tell me anyway."

As you start to pick out clothes for today (the same classic shorts and blue striped sweater) you tell Flowey your plans. "I'm going to be a detective."

He snorts, unimpressed. "And what are you investigating today, detective Frisk? Who ate the last cookie? Where your goldfish went?"

"Nope!" Having finished getting dressed, you dig around in the drawers of your desk, looking for a notebook and pencil. "I'm gonna figure out where Sans and Papyrus are from!"

Flowey is silent for a long time. When you find your notepad, you turn to look at him. He doesn't have his usual snarky expression.

"That's... a really stupid idea, Frisk." But again, the words lack his usual bluster. He sounds almost... nervous.

"Why?" You ask, turning to find a pencil.

"It just is."

You make a show of pretending to think about it. Then you shrug. "I'm gonna do it."

"No. Don't mess with Sans."

That gives you pause for a moment. He said Sans, specifically. Not Sans and Papyrus, just Sans. You know that Sans and Flowey don't like each other, but this sounds like more than the general animosity they share. But as far as you know, Sans has never fought Flowey. Not the way he's fought you. Flowey has never given any indication that he knows what Sans is capable of.

"Why?" You ask again. "What's the worst that could happen?"

Flowey just looks at you. "Just don't do it."

"I don't see why not."

"Don't talk to him!"

"That's not good enough...!" You say in a singsong tone, leaning close to the flower. "I think we'll go talk to him now!"

With a shout of irritation, he gives. "AGH! Don't take me anywhere NEAR that- that smiley trashbag! He's a freak, and he can do too many things that he shouldn't be able to!"

With a victorious smile, you lean away from Flowey. "Thanks, Flowey! You just gave me my first clue!"

In your notebook, you write

•S scares F Something happened?
•F says S can "do things he shouldn't be able to"

Meanwhile, Flowey just looks astonished. "Wha- I-..."

With that you nod, put your notebook into your inventory, and pick up Flowey's flower pot. "I think we should talk to mom, next!"

Flowey just lets out a moan. "Can't we at least get breakfast, first?"

You laugh as you walk out of your room. "We can multitask!"

§

A/N

I almost feel bad for Frisk. They have no idea what they're in for.

... But then I remember that, if I just made everything happy, we'd have no story. So nevermind.

Anyway, thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoyed it! Comments and votes are my Favorite Things, and every notification I get makes my day!