flaws // h.s & j.t

seventeen

flaws // bastille

When I awoke, I was surrounded by two girls, Perrie and Leigh-Anne.

"Hey guys," I sleepily mumbled.

"Oh my God, you're awake!" Leigh-Anne squealed as they both tackled me for a hug.

"So, where's Jesy?" I asked. Leigh-Anne and Perrie both looked at each other before telling me. "Erm, well, she was sick, and, erm, she didn't want to infect you," Perrie gasped.

"Guys, you can tell me, I don't care," I shrugged.

"It doesn't matter, but she sends her love!" Leigh-Anne remarked.

What are they hiding from me?

"Oh, erm, okay. I guess I'll see her once I'm out of here then," I said.

"Yeah! Anyway so I'll fill you in on the goss," Perrie laughed.

"Shoot," I nodded.

"Well, Louis's sad that he took advantage of you and he broke up with Eleanor, he claimed that she wasn't the one for him, because he still likes you and 'hat. But I really don't understand that boy, it's dead obvious that you don't like him like that, y'know? So me and Jes aren't talking to him," Perrie chirped.

"Are you?" I questioned Leigh.

"Erm, no not really. I'm ignoring him, but I'm just terrible at holding grudges," she admitted.

"Aw, Leigh! So how's Harry?" I asked.

"He could be better, Jade. I'm not gonna lecture you about what ya've done, but y'know ya shouldn't have, slept with Louis. He's, he's got a new girl actually, but Zayn told me he misses you. You look an awful lot like her, if I'm being quite honest," Perrie told me honestly.

"Oh," I whispered as a solitary tear fell down my cheek. Am I really that easy to replace? Did I really mean nothing to that boy?

"I'm really sorry, Jade," Leigh said.

"Nah, nah it's fine. I sorta brought this on meself. It hurts, obviously, but I can't say what I done to him didn't hurt, because it obviously did," I admitted.

"Why did you do it?" Perrie questioned. I tensed up, and Perrie noticed that I suddenly tensed. "I'm curious, sorry if you don't wanna answer,"

"Well, emm, I like to think I'm wanted, d'y'know what I mean? Like when Louis admitted he liked me, I just felt all rebellious. I really dunno how to explain it, but I wanted to feel like someone out there wanted me," Perrie and Leigh nodded for me to continue. "I know Harry wanted me, but it's not the same. I can't describe it. But I still like Harry, which is so fucked up. Why would I want him? I was the one who cheated on him, y'know? And I don't know, like I said this is all really hard to explain because I still don't know what the fuck was going through my mind, but I expected him being the one beggin' for me, but he's not, and I'm begging for him," I let out a dry laugh.

"Well, that is pretty fucked up," I expected Perrie and Leigh-Anne to leave me, as everyone else has in the past. "But, you are one of my best friends, and even though you done something really stupid, I have to believe in you," Perrie told me.

"I love you guys! I exclaimed.

"Anyway, enough about us, why did you attempt suicide?" Leigh asked.

"Well, I guess I just felt like I wasn't needed. If I died, sure people would be upset, but that's really it. I'm not that important, y'know?" I told them honestly.

"Jade, you are important," Perrie told me. Those four words literally made me feel indestructable.

"By the way guys, I can leave tomorrow!" I exclaimed.