November 5

97 18 10
                                    

Dear Kyle,

Will is in.

Tomorrow is the big day, and I have to say I don't think there's anything I could possibly do to calm my nerves. It's like the night before my mouth surgery. That night I didn't sleep one bit.

And it turned out to not be that bad. It was just a week full of eating ice cream and noodles. But this is so different. Kyle this shit is my life, not a fucking tooth.

I'm pretty sure Will only agreed to it because he has nothing to lose. Might as well go out with a bang you know?

This is my last time writing in this journal and I'm starting to cry.

You bought me this journal for my birthday a couple years ago. And so with that I filled the first twenty pages with pictures of you, and us.

It's funny because you always said scrapbooking was gay, and look where we are now.

My favorite one was taken by your mother the night we went out to dinner. We both had on suits, and damn did we look good. You described the look as "James bond-ish."

Then again there's the one of me in the field you always loved. You were being an asshole and shining a flashlight in my eyes. I love the picture. You can see the happiness within me that's rare.

And then there's one of my many favorites of you. You were trying to help your mother build a shelving unit from ikea. And the best part was the fact that despite the fact that it was "too hot" to keep your shirt on, you still had on your high black crew socks.

Kyle I know I'm stalling, it's just in not ready to say goodbye to you yet.

Yes I know you're already technically gone, but in a way you're here because of this journal. That's why I've written to you so many times.

I really hope that Chris takes this journal and throws it away. But I guess that won't be in my hands. I also really hope that his wife gives birth to a son. He told me that he would be happy with either gender, but secretly he had always wanted a baby boy.

I just want him to be happy. He really does deserve the world. Just like you.

Kyle I just want to say thank you. I know I fucked everything up, but I just wanted to say one last time you're the greatest thing to ever happen to me.

I really fucking loved you.

Love,
your Danny xx

---
I don't think I've ever been so sad to end a story before

hit and runWhere stories live. Discover now