Make a wish. //PJM AU//

Diary entry 9.

20 May

//Start

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It's been 2 days since I last visited Alicia, and that urge inside me of just looking at her was now irresistible. But I knew I had to stay away from her. She was already uncomfortable around me. And I did not intend to get closer to her because that would only lead to her being involved with my life which won't be beneficial for someone like her. She's too pure to get indulged in something or someone like me.

So I decided to go to the club, according to V, that was a place where you enter into a different world if you enjoy rather than look for someone to kill. Which I never found interesting but now when I wanted to get my mind off of things, I thought that maybe the club was a good idea. Getting drunk although it was hard for someone like me to get drunk even after a couple of drinks but I could try.

So I went to the club, as I watched people dance, clinging onto each other. A couple years ago I would've freaked out by this sight but now it just disgusted and amused me at the same time, just because of the human nature. They really can't control themselves, not that I was any better. But these humans were seriously too much.

I drank a couple of shots and finally felt a little light headed. That's when I saw a girl approach me, she was wearing a black dress that reached her mid thigh, her long black hair fell down behind her back as she sat down beside me. I ignored her as I ordered another drink.

"You seem down, what's up? Breakup?" I heard her say and all I wanted was to roll my eyes at her attempt to talk to me.

But I wanted to let my feelings out, and this was the best chance I had gotten so far since V wasn't really an option and I never talked to anyone else. Why not her? It's not like we'll ever cross each others paths after this.

That's when I told her how I've been struggling with my feelings about someone, and how we were both two opposite poles but I was attracted towards her, and I can't be close to her because I just wasn't someone she would want to be with.

I saw the amused look on the girls face but it soon sobered down. "If you really love her, tell her before it's too late, before you regret not doing it all your life. Trust me that's worse than fighting your feelings for someone. After this, you go to her and express your feeling, alright?" She explained and I was nodding for some reason, although I didn't look at her, I was in deep thoughts. Will I be able to do this?

"Who are you?" Was what I asked as the girl chuckled and got up from her chair.

"Someone that wanted to help you."

--

I was standing in front of her door after the drink, just like she advised me to. But I couldn't muster up the courage to talk to her. I can't just go up and tell her how I liked her although I've only met her twice or thrice?

So I went home today, promising myself to do this tomorrow. I just hope everything goes well.

PJM.

End.//