5 September
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It's has already been 3 months since Alicia left me. Today was the day she was mercilessly murdered by the person who I once used to call my best friend, V.
I know I stopped writing after that day and today is the last day I'll be writing. Today is the last diary entry. Because the world around me feels like it's suffocating me slowly and painfully.
There isn't any reason for me to live now, I tried so hard to get back to my old life, to feel nothing all over again but I can't, I just can't seem to get her and her last moment with me out of my mind. Not once did I lay my hands on any other person after June 5th, the day I got destroyed, the day my soul died but my body is still alive and it feels like a burden on me now.
I feel uneasy, I've not had a good sleep since 3 whole months, whenever I close my eyes I see her in front of me with that innocent smile of hers, and I feel like I failed, and I did. Not being able to save her, I saw her die right before my eyes and I was unable to do anything. I can't help but blame myself.
After that day V came to me, apologizing but I knew he didn't mean it. I knew he wanted to kill her, he wanted to take her away from me. And he succeeded in his plan.
He was happy and I wasn't. He was healed and I was broken. He won and I lost.
He kept on coming to me even if I told him I hated to see his face, he reminded me of who I am, and of what he did to me but he didn't stop. He was also the reason for my next step, and I will blame him, because he was the one who damaged me, he had already killed me but I was still breathing for some reason and all I wanted was to stop that too.
"I love you Park Jimin." Her words, I can never forget them. She loved me, she was the first person to ever love me but V took her away from me. And now I don't have anyone, I have no reason to live, to breathe, I am a burden on this earth. Everything reminded me of her, of her pure and innocent self and I felt my heart sinking whenever I thought that I was the reason why she died. She wouldn't have died if I wouldn't get close to her, if I would have listened to V.
Karma was real, and it knocked on my door because of all the disgusting things I did to people, although I stopped after I met an angel but the devil inside me had done enough damage and the angel was helpless against him.
So I will do what my heart tells me to, just like the way I listened to my heart when I was with Alicia and spent some of the best moments of my life, one last time I will follow my own heart which I never knew existed before I came across her.
I hope V really does realize his mistake and I hope he finds someone who he loves and spends his life being happy, fulfilling my own dream I had with Alicia.
But most of all, I want to know why V did this to me?
PJM.
End.//
YOU ARE READING
Make a wish. //PJM AU//
Fanfiction"It was 11:11 and he had to catch his next prey soon for this one was long gone." ~Diary owned by PJM, brave enough to read the story of his life?~ //Once upon a time an angel and a devil fell in love, it did not end well.//
