my heart...

The Forgotten Player

Dear [you'll know who you are],

Yes, I love you, but I really don't like you. You pretend to care for me, and even lie about being an active player in this game that you created. The first time you played made you feel alive and like it was a gift bestowed upon you when you most needed it. The next time you played across from me. When we started, all you wanted was my full attention, many precious moments, and time to get to know each other, but I already knew my time with you was up when someone new came into town. You liked the liveliness they that they gave you daily and that's when I didn't see you anymore. You stopped coming to our games after only 2 days and left me with someone who also only came to leave me as soon as we made the connection. I didn't have a partner, a coach, a friend anymore. I lost you- the one who filled my days with joy- and your presence was replaced with a combination of my tears and the rain droplets that would fall to my board. The only thing that has kept me from leaving my seat is the other players you've left me for and the smile that i see every time you play with them. It hurts these days because no matter what I do for your attention to the game you have left to me to control, you always tell me we'll continue it "later". And every time, I tell myself it's true even though deep inside I know that you were never there for the next move, and you might never be. It's hard to come to terms with the fact that this game that you've left has made me fell hurt by you (even though I've been used to it for so long now). But please do me one favor: tell me the truth and finish our game properly. Ive been on my own, left to finish what you had started, so it's only fair that you let me move on and find another partner in this game for two. All I'm trying to say is you never knew me and you probably never will. And yes, I know you probably won't ever read this letter and won't even know it's you I'm writing to, but I want you to know my feelings towards our short journey together. You hurt me and made me cry a lot without even laying a hand on me, but I guess that's just the ability of a writer isn't it? To create a series of words that may move people to tears and touch on their feelings. This may be great for those who need the entertainment, but I don't like your negligence towards me and how obvious it is that you like the others you've played with before. It's now that I've gotten to the point that I care so much for you and those who don't do Sh*t for me, that I don't even really care about myself anymore- and I didn't realize it until the second I wrote this down. So, please... release me.

Sincerely,
The Forgotten Player