As long as you love me (kevin and you)

Kiss

I lost him, thank God i did. I didn't want to see his face anymore.

I got so tired of running that I decided to stop at a small coffeeshop. It was rather cute, I was curious about their cakes do I bought one along with some hot chocolate so I could calm down.

"Kyung Mi?"

Ugh, I don't want to talk to anyone should I ignore? No, thats rude.

I looked up and none other than Kevin, the boy I haven't seen in a while. To be honest, I feel happy to see him, so I got up and hugged him.

"I missed you" I smiled as I felt his arms around me, hugging me back.

"I missed you too, how have you been? Can I join you?"

"Of course!" I sat down. "I've been okay, how about you?"

"My life has been pretty hectic, you know family and work. But I finally have a break today" he smiled. He has a beautiful smile.

I hadn't noticed how much time we spent talking until I looked outside and saw that the sun was already gone.

I know it's pretty hard to miss but the conversations we were having were so interesting. They went from our daily lives to talking about netflix and what type of shows we liked to watch on our free time.

Seeing Kevin definitely made my day a hundred times better, he kept my mind off Eli, and thats what I wanted.

After we got out of the coffeeshop, Kevin insisted that he'd take me home. I tried to decline but he didn't take no for an answer.
The ride was silent, but for some odd reason, I felt very comfortable. It was obvious that we were both immersed in our thoughts and didn't need to have a conversation.

"We're here...sadly" he pouted.

"Why sadly?"

Did he want to spend more time with me? Normally people get tired of me pretty fast.

"I love spending time with you, I love our endless conversations, and the fact that I get to cheat on my diet thanks to you" he chuckled.

As if he needed a diet.

"I love hanging out with you too, maybe we can hang out soon. I'm always free" I smiled.

"Sounds like a plan" he smiled back. He seemed genuinely happy about that Idea, so was I.

"So I'll see you then. Goodnight Kevin, don't work too hard okay?"

As I was about to get out of the car I was pulled back by him. I gave him a confused look but he just kept quiet.
I would take this as a chance to get out but he was still holding on to me so I just stayed there until he would let me go.

"Im sorry..." He spoke.

"For wha-..."

I was interrupted by a kiss.

A kiss...

I'm so shocked by the action that I don't move a muscle, I just let him kiss me, but I don't kiss back. I can't...

This is cheating..

I'm cheating on Eli...why don't I feel bad about this? I should feel horrible, but I don't. It could be my thirst for revenge that is taking my body, but this is wrong, on so many levels. I didn't want to stoop to his level. I didn't want to be like him.

So I pulled away and went directly towards my house and into my room.

I might regret doing this but I decided to text Eli, and tell him to come.
By the time he arrived, Kevin was already gone, he stayed there for a while but I guess he didn't want to make the situation worse so he just left, and I appreciate that, he did leave some texts messages though which I will read later on. Right now, my mind was focused on Eli.

I told him to come up to my room where I was. And the moment he came inside I rushed to him and kisses him.

I kissed him deeply. Deeper than I have ever kissed him before. This, of course, took him by surprised, but he kisses back nonetheless.

His arms went around my waist as he pulled me closer to somehow deepen the kiss even more, if such a thing was even possible.

I don't know what I'm doing right now. I didn't want to think, I just let my body take action, and I'm guessing it wants to be a hoe and kiss everyone.

Eli on the other hand was surprised yet happy that I wasn't mad anymore like I was earlier when I left him.

"Kyu-..." He tried to talk but I shut him up with another kiss hoping he would get the message that I didn't want to talk about anything for now.

Luckily, he got it and just kissed back. I'm hoping that doesn't take this as a chance to take me to bed, because I'm not up for that, but a little action doesn't bother, as long as we don't go further than kissing, I'm good; I am a virgin after all, and I'm not exactly ready to go all the way yet.

"I won't do anything you don't want me to, just tell me when to stop..." He breathed. I just nodded in response.

He laid me me down on the bed gently, as if I was the most delicate flower. I looked at him as he hovered over me, looking directly into my eyes; he then proceeded to kiss me again, but this time he was loving and gentle.

The night went on like that, full of kisses and gentle caresses. It was amazing but in my head, I was screaming at myself, hating myself for what I had done earlier.

Hopefully he'll never find out. At least not until I'm ready to tell him. Because I'm not going to keep it a secret, he deserves to know, after all, he's a changed man, he's proven that he is. So he doesn't deserve the pain. The past is the past even if he ruined my life, I forgave him a long tome ago.

Let's see if he forgives me now.