just fall | ✓

4.

They walked me back to my room somewhere around three in the morning, which I hadn't been expecting. I'd thought that they would leave me at some point, but they made sure that they saw me back to my door. No one had ever walked me anywhere other than Colten, but that had been when I was a small, lanky twelve-year-old that was shivering from fear and the rain.

Prince Mason smiled at me and spoke two turns from my room, pulling me out of my little reverie. "We would appreciate it if you didn't tell the others about this, Lady Cassiana. We technically weren't supposed to meet you until tomorrow morning, before breakfast."

"Technically? I think you mean definitely."

The brothers froze and turned. Behind them were two women dressed in lovely gowns, one significantly shorter than the other. Both had their arms folded over their chests and their eyebrows raised. I presumed that they were the queen and the princess.

The queen spoke this time. "You two should be in bed and not bothering your Selected. You may not need rest, but this poor girl definitely does." She smiled at me kindly. "I apologize for my sons, Lady Cassiana. They can be quite bothersome."

I struggled into a half-assed curtsey. Being an Eight meant that until about thirty-six hours ago, I'd never had to learn things like how to eat with more than one utensil sitting in front of me or curtseying. You know, the things that are trivial to me but everything to these people. "They weren't any bother at all, Your Highness."

The queen smiled at me, glancing at the princess. I noticed that the young girl was struggling to hide a smile. "You don't need to bother with the formalities, Lady Cassiana," the princess said. "Every other formality hasn't been followed by my brothers thus far, so there's no point in curtseying. And besides, it's three in the morning. Far too early to bother with all of those formalities, anyway." She shot a look at her brothers. If not for her small size and the youthful glow in her cheeks, I would have assumed her to be older than her brothers. I thought it was the eyes—the princes had dull, nearly lifeless eyes, surrounded by dark smudges. Their eyes were sunken into their pale, gaunt faces, and their shoulders were slightly stooped, as if they were already holding the world's weight on them. Their sister, on the other hand, was still bright and full of life, her cheeks round and flushed. There was nothing gaunt about the young princess.

I apologized quietly for curtseying, and then again for not doing as I should have been.

Prince Mason looked appalled by my second apology. "You have no need to apologize for that, Lady Cassiana. You were quite distressed, and it was clear that you needed help."

"Distressed?" The queen looked concerned. She looked at me. "Are you all right, Lady Cassiana?"

I smiled and nodded. I was still a little shaken up inside, but I didn't like all of the attention on me. I didn't like that I was standing out. I just wanted to curl up in my room and not come out until they sent me home. It was a little late for that, so I replied, "I'm better now, thank you. I should be returning to my room. I apologize for keeping you all up." I curtsied again, quickly, and then turned and started down the hall.

Footsteps followed behind me. It was Prince Alexander and the princess that had caught up to me, and I could hear the quiet protests of the queen and of Prince Mason behind us. Alexander silently offered me his arm, which I hesitantly took. "You didn't need to follow me," I told them quietly. "I've troubled you all enough."

The princess shook her head. "You were distressed earlier, Lady Cassiana, and I hesitate to leave you alone on the walk back to your room."

I turned to Prince Alexander. "And you?" I asked quietly. "You should be resting. I'm sure you have an early day tomorrow."

He smiled wryly. "I believe that you mean today, Lady Cassiana." He added, so quiet that I didn't think his sister heard, "I won't be able to sleep if I don't see you back to your room and make sure that you are well."

We reached my door. He sent his sister off, assuring her that he'd follow soon, but that he wished to share a few words with me in private. Based on her look, I could tell that she was disappointed. But I could also see that he would be telling her what occurred later. I couldn't find it in me to be bothered by this.

He opened my bedroom door for me and gestured for me to enter, and then followed behind me, half-shutting the door. "Will you be all right alone, Lady Cassiana? I can ask a guard to stay in here with you, if you'd like. Or I can call Clara back. I'm sure that she wouldn't mind staying with you until you must get dressed."

I smiled hesitantly at him, glancing at the door. My stomach was in knots, and I could feel the muscles in my legs tensing. I wrapped my arms around myself. The balcony doors were still open, and I was shivering, but I was not cold.

"I'll be fine, thank you," I said. I looked again at the door.

Thankfully, he got the message and moved towards the door. "Very well. I hope you sleep well, Lady Cassiana. I will see you in the morning."

It was only after he shut the door to my room that I felt like I could breathe again. My knees gave out, and I sank to the floor beside my bed, too exhausted to move. I don't recall sleeping that night.