Finding the Phandom: A Dan and Phil AU

Chapter 11

Dan and Phil had created a monster.

And that monsters name? The Phandom. 

Ever since PINOF (Phil is not on fire), there has been an extreme response to "Dan and Phil" as a pair. They haven't filmed any more collabs yet, and they haven't been spotted in public together either, but people have it figured out. People know they are close, people know they are good friends, and Dan has no idea how the hell they figured it out. 

Phil keeps telling him that they will think what they want, but Dan doesn't want 6 million teenage girls making assumptions about his life, when he and Phil haven't even talked about it yet. 

After their first kiss on the London Eye, Dan was ecstatic, but also terrified. He has liked Phil since he first discovered his videos, he has often thought about what it would be like to feel Phil's lips on his own, what it would feel like to be wrapped in Phil's arms, what it would feel like to feel Phil's hands on his body. Phil's kiss was endlessly more amazing than he could have ever imagined, and that alone scared the shit out of him.

Dan was scared of his feelings. He was scared of finding something worth keeping, worth protecting. Because when things go to shit, like they always do, he doesn't want to be shattered by it. So every time Phil starts talking about their kiss, any of them, Dan changes the subject. 

Phil has tried to talk about their kiss on the London Eye multiple times, but Dan has always been able to change the subject. It was harder for Dan to avoid talking about their next kiss. The kiss they shared during PINOF.

Phil tackled Dan to the floor during filming. Dan was not prepared for the sudden contact, and they fell to the ground. Phil situated on top of Dan. The two men glanced at each other, blue eyes meet brown ones, both uncertain. The uncertainty faded as the older boy lowered his lips to the younger's. This kiss was deeper than the one before it, still relatively innocent, but laced with something deeper. 

Phil's lips moved against Dan's slowly. Phil's doll-like lips were as soft as Dan had thought they would be. Dan's lips were chapped, and cracking. As their lips moved together, the feelings that they both had, and were containing, were laid out between them. Dan was sure Phil could feel what he felt, and that only scared him more. 

Their kiss was cut short by the beeping of the camera. Since Phil's camera can only record for 20 minutes at a time, that sound marked the end of this 20 minutes session.

Dan was pulled from his memory by the faint sound of snoring. Phil was lying beside Dan, facing each other, ankles and wrists intertwined. This was not the first time that Dan has woken in this position. Virtually every day since filming PINOF Dan found himself at Phil's flat, watching TV on the couch, sleeping in Phil's bed, waking up to the sound of Phil's breathing. 

Dan stared at the pale man, grinning to himself. There is still a large part of Dan that is convinced that this is all a dream. Dan watches the breath enter and leave Phil's body, watched his chest rise and fall, watching the sign of Phil's life. Phil was living and breathing and right in front of Dan. 

Phil's eyes fluttered open, sleep still clear in his eyes. "Morning," Phil's voice was deep and raspy. Morning breath followed his words, but Dan couldn't bring himself to care. 

"Good morning, Philly," Dan was surprised by his own voice, equally as deep as Phil's possibly due to lack of use. "Did you sleep well? Considering you hogged my blanket all night?" His words were sarcastic, but his smile was gentle. 

"Sorry about that, I didn't realize I was a cover hog... You should have just stolen the blanket back." Phil had a guilty grin on his face. Dan decided to test his own limits. 

"What if next time, I steal all the blankets?" His voice was a challenge, and he was really hoping Phil would take the bait.

"That's assuming there will be a next time." Phil's voice held just as much of a challenge as Dan's.

"Oh, you know there will be a next time, you like warming your ice cube toes on my legs." They hadn't moved yet. They were still lying facing one another, wrists entwined, hands almost in each others grasps. 

"Well if you hate it that much, keep your warm legs away from my feet." That damn smirk.

"Maybe next time, I'll just cuddle up to you, and steal all your warmth." Dan wasn't sure where he was expecting this to go, and his anxiety was screaming at him to stop this banter, but his heart was winning out this time. 

"Maybe you should." A challenge. Dan could see it. Phil wasn't referring to next time, he was talking about this time. 

Dan's demons were attacking, his anxiety reeling. What if he was misunderstanding, what if Phil was just joking around, and when Dan went to touch him, Phil would recoil? What if it was awkward, or awful? What if it didn't feel right? His mind was racing, his demons roaring. 

Phil could tell something was off, he could see emotions reeling behind Dan's brown eyes. Phil wasn't sure what caused Dan's inner turmoil, but seeing this look in Dan's eyes unnerved Phil. Phil reached his hand up and brushed the brown hair off of Dan's forehead. Dan's eyes seemed to focus in on Phil, the darkness leaving his eyes momentarily. 

Dan moved closer to Phil, lifting his head slightly. Phil immediately accommodated Dan by placing his arm around Dan's shoulder. Dan's head rested on Phil's clothed chest, one arm curled against his chest, the other resting over Phil's. Phil absentmindedly runs his fingers through Dan's hair, in a continuous soothing motion. Dan momentarily forgot his Demons. 

~

Dan had to film a new video. He hadn't posted a video since his quiz video, and that was almost a month ago. He knew he needed to film, but he hasn't left Phil's flat in almost a week. He's been eating with Phil, sleeping in Phil's bed, showering in Phil's shower. He was content to never leave, but he had to film, and his fans would notice if he had a new background. 

"Phil, I have to go home." Dan's head was on Phil's chest, his new favorite place to be. 

"Why?" Phil's hands ran through Dan's dark hair. 

"I have to film. It's been a month, and my subscribers would notice if I filmed here." Dan sat up, resting his hands on Phil's chest. 

Phil looked up at Dan. "Can I come with you?" 

"If you want. My bed isn't nearly as comfy as here." Dan looked thoughtful, almost realizing he was assuming Phil would be joining him for the night. "If you decide you want to stay that is... Since you don't have to stay if you don't want to. Or we could come back here after I film, if you want me to. Or we could FaceTime like we used to... Or-" 

Phil cut him off, "Dan, I would love to stay at your flat." Dan smiled his big smile, dimples deep and eyes bright. "You know you're cute, right?" Dan blushed.

~

A/N: Sorry this is kinda short, but I wanted to get something to you guys, so this was a transitioning chapter to set up the next thing that I want to happen. 

I finished my finals for the semester, so my updates *should* come more frequently.

Thanks for being so great and reading this! You're all amazing!