The PLAYBOY (Shalnark x Reader: Modern COMPLETED)

Chapter 1

Reader's POV

The alarm woke me up early in the morning and I lazily turned it off with my hand. I rolled over so I could face the ceiling with my eyes still close, then sigh deeply. I placed both of my hands under my head then slowly opened my eyes so now I could see the f/c ceiling above me.

Another day of torture, sadness and disappointment.

As I was looking up the ceiling, it made me wonder, why do I still go to school? Why do I even bother showing my ugly faces to everyone when it's clearly shown that nobody likes me or need me. Why do I even try?

Try everyday to go to school, be friendly towards other people, help them, try to fit it but in return, they throw all of those things on my face in a bad way. They bully me verbally, mentally and physically. They're the reasons why I got all the cuts and bruises on my arms.

No one wants me. No one even bother talking to me or even get close to me. So what's the point of going to school? Yes I am top of my class, the best at every subject but still, everyday I have to face those bullies and cry somewhere where no one can see the pain that I'm feeling.

In six years I have to live with that torture. Yes I do have a brother, Chrollo, and he's one of the most popular guy at school, but I didn't want anyone to know that I'm his little sister because I don't want to ruin his reputation.

Here I am, down at the ground which you could also call hell while he's in heaven. Lots of girls like him and sometimes when the popular girls see me with him, they hurt me later. I could fight back because of some of the moves that my brother had taught me but I didn't want to hurt anyone.

I don't want to add more hatred towards me and ruin my reputation even more. So to solve the problem, I distant myself from the others and if someone bullies me, I just let them because later on, they will leave me alone. I don't like crying anymore because it already dried up with all my crying inside six years and it's not worth it anymore anyway.

No one cares if I cry, even if I cry the whole day. No one care if I just disappear one day like a bubble. I hate my life and that's all I could say. The only person who had shown care towards me is my brother, but I also distant myself away from him as well so he won't see my pain and I don't want to worry him.

Our mum died when I was seven years old and everyday, our dad would blame it all on me of why she died. Every night he would be drunk and would call my name just to abuse me and give me more pain. Of course my brother was always there to help me but one day, I told him not to because I was fine and I didn't need his help.

Well I did need his help because he always save me from our dad but in return of that, he's the one who's getting abuse so I decided that I will endure all the pain, hoping one day it would all disappear.

There's one thing I'd always wanted in my life and everyday, every night, I prayed that one friend, just only one friend, I wish that I could only have one friend who would show me what it feels like to have a friend. That's all I wanted, a friend who would always be there for me when I needed him or her the most.

Just one friend who would always support me and won't ever tell me that I'm useless. The one friend who would teach me what love feels like. That one friend who would finally put a smile on my face and would tell me that I'm beautiful just the way I am. That's all I ask for, is that hard to be given? Just. One. Friend. Is that too much to ask?

But I guess my destiny or call it fate is to be alone, alone forever, alone till I die without experiencing what love is. What it feels like. In the end, I have decided to push every one away, including my brother, because in this world, I deserve to be alone.

That's my fate and destiny and I already accepted it. I will live alone, suffer alone, be alone forever and die alone. Alone till I grow old without anyone to hold on, alone just like how it's suppose to be. A. L. O. N. E

"Hey Y/n, are you awake? We're gonna be late!" Chrollo reminded me of school and I let out a sigh of depression.

I turned to the side where my drawer was and a mirror, to which showed my reflection and I stared at my own reflection, hearing the voices of what they call me.

"Monster!"

"Ugly!"

"Beast!"

"You know where you belong bogeyman? In hell!"

"Savage!"

"You're a sadist animal that should just die!"

"You don't belong here retard!"

"Leave us alone in peace ugly ghost!"