Deleted Scenes - It Should Have Been Us Book One

47

{Nadine’s POV}

I will never have sex for the rest of my life ever again. No way. That was the first thought that popped inside my head when I got hit by that stabbing pain. I felt like I was being ripped into two from the inside. I didn’t know what came over me to actually request not to be given any pain reliever no matter how much I asked. Now I feel like asking – begging even. That first cry though – I feel so weak but I tried to keep my eyes open when the nurse brought his face next to mine.

Then she placed him on my chest, with his little face near my heart. My tears fell. I can’t believe he came from me. I wrapped my arm around him and kept him close. Hey, little guy. I’m your mommy and I love you so much. I cried – like literally ugly cry. It has been so long since I felt this loneliness creeping in. He was taken away from me for cleaning.

I was prepped up and wheeled into the private room where my mom and dad and Zach and Q wait anxiously; Yassi and Andre sitting by the couch. Everyone hugged me once I got settled down the bed. My mom asked how I was feeling but the door opened even before I got the chance to reply to her. The nurse carrying my baby all bundled up in white baby blanket came in. Everyone gathered around us once he’s in my arms, then they took turns carrying him and taking the obligatory newborn selfies.

Q was the last one. He carefully laid down my baby boy in my waiting arms.

Hey, selfie tayo. Then he pulled out his phone and snapped our picture.

Ang cute!!! Yassi exclaimed.

Ano’ng ipapangalan mo? My mom asked.

Robert Alexis Reid. My eyes linger on his face; taking in every single detail. How his little eyelids flutter and his lips makes this cute little o’s while he sleeps. My tears fell and soon my sniffles filled the room.

Hey…hey, what’s wrong. Q was right next to me in an instant, rubbing my shoulders.

Kung…kung andito kaya sya…mapapatawad nya kaya ako? I looked up and saw the sympathy on their faces.

My mom, took Q’s place and wiped my tears away. Tahan na. Masama yung iyak ng iyak, kakapanganak mo lang. Wala namang may kasalanan eh.

Sana andito sya ‘my. I wish he can see him. Siguro…siguro kung makikita nya si baby, magiging love nya na rin tapos magiging okay na lahat.

Shhh….shhhh. My Dad sat on the other side of the bed. Then they enveloped me in a most reassuring hug. Magiging okay din lahat.  

And they were right. Robert Alexis Reid filled the next days of my life with unexplainable joy that thoughts of James started slipping out of my mind.

Q stayed for a few days in Japan, visiting every day. While Yassi and Andre had to go home the next day for an engagement they can’t reschedule. My mom stayed with me for a full month while my Dad had to go home for my siblings. Every other month or so, they would come visit us.

Yassi and Andre even stayed with us for an entire week. One time, they even asked me to enjoy the sun outside. It was probably our first day out together when I didn’t have to worry about household chores because Yassi volunteered to cook and Andre to help clean the house. It was a surprise to find Q was in Japan too. He popped up while we were at the park, giving me a scare actually.

I was caught up in the book that I was reading when I felt someone staring at me; I looked up only to find his face right in front of my face. I was so crept out I almost screamed if not for his laugh and his warning that I’m going to wake the baby. On his fifth month, Andre came up with the Reese nickname.

We spent his first birthday in Japan. The thought of going back to the Philippines already crossing my mind. When the plane touched down and my mom took Reese from me, I didn’t follow them instantly. I looked around and my eyes landed on a group of guys making too much noise what with them pushing each other around.

It was Henz and Sam; they noticed me and they nudged the guy wearing white sando with his back facing me. His face emotionless; only registering a bit of surprise when his eyes crossed mine.

Then their flight was called and I turned to follow my mom. I took in a deep breath.

Nothing feels like home.