My Lonely Road - Joshler

Chapter 4

Carl had darted into the cafeteria to get his beloved pizza, with Josh tagging along to buy lunch and show him where they were sitting.

Tyler and Ian had gone outside to claim their table and wait for the others. Tyler had chosen his normal spot under the oak trees, and Ian agreed that it was nice and sat down too. after a few minutes of awkward silence (there seemed to be a lot of that lately) Ian looked up at Tyler with a slight smirk on his face.

"so..." he said. "Josh, huh?"

"yeah, i guess," Tyler replied, feeling a little weird about talking about it so openly. "and...Carl?" he cocked his head, staring back at Ian.

"yeah," Ian nodded, smiling at the sound of Carl's name. "this is going to be one weird lunch period." he said. Tyler hummed in agreement and rested his head on the wooden table, suddenly feeling tired. socializing was hard work.

"hey, you okay?" Ian asked, looking at Tyler with his head down.

"i don't know," Tyler said, his head still down, like he was talking to the table instead of Ian. "i'm not used to hanging out with people...ever. i'm usually alone. and i'm also kind of freaking about because i don't eat in public. or at all, really." Tyler felt beyond awkward about telling Ian about his eating disorder and insecurities, but he felt that he could trust Ian, and that he wouldn't suddenly stop being Tyler's friend because of some imperfections. everyone had them, right?

Ian slowly nodded, taking in the fact that Tyler didn't have any food with him.

"so why did you start now?" he said.

"what?"

"how come you suddenly started making friends now? y'know, if you don't really socialize all that much."

Tyler didn't answer right away. he hadn't really thought about why he suddenly decided to not be alone. Josh sort of just called out to him, in a way. he just kind of showed up in Tyler's life, being nice and friendly and cute and perfect. and he seemed to even want to be Tyler's friend. what Tyler did to deserve such a person, he had no idea. also, Ian was like such a akward sweetheart and Carl seemed pretty cool. things were just kind of working out.

he voiced these thoughts to Ian, who was patiently waiting on a reply. "i don't know," he said again. "things just seem to kind of be working out, i guess."

Ian nodded, seemingly understanding. "ah. well, i'm glad." he told Tyler.

a couple more minutes passed, but these weren't awkward ones. they were in a comfortable silence, just taking in the peaceful fall atmosphere around them, reminding Tyler of why he liked the season so much. fall also had halloween, which Tyler always thought was pretty cool but he never did anything for it because he was always alone. maybe he could do something this year.

at the sound of Carl and Josh's voices, Tyler and Ian perked up and scooted over to make room for them at the table. they were carrying foam trays with slices of pizza on them.

"sorry that took so long," Josh said, sitting next to Tyler and glaring at Carl. "Carl here almost had a meltdown because they ran out of pepperoni. so we waited until they made more."

"yes we did, and we got fresh, beautiful pepperoni pizza," Carl retaliated, sitting down next to Ian, who tried to hide his smile.

"hey," Josh frowned. "what are you gonna eat?" he said to Tyler.

"we could go back and get you some pizza," Carl offered, grinning.

"nonsense," Josh said. "you just want to go get another slice."

"Tyler can have some of my lunch if he wants," Ian interrupted, pulling out his lunchbox from under the table. he shot a sympathetic and knowing glance Tyler's way.