'Little bold one'

Rough nights

Mother explained to Derek that I really needed her support from a 'rocky path I had built myself'. She slept in my bed most nights the week after me and Clarke had spoken. I needed my loving mother more than ever in this complicated position I was in.
I have feelings for Clarke. Clarke, my future step brother.
Shit.
"Calvina, I know you're hurt right now even if I don't know what's going on but please don't swear." I can't believe it. I've never sworn before. I'm 15, a good girl and I've never said a swear before. This feeling that has churned up my stomach has caused me to swear out loud.
"Sorry mother. Are you able to get me some tea; I'm parched." This would allow me to have some space from her. As much as I loved how kind my mother can be, she does smother me way too much.
This past week I haven't seen Clarke's face. His beautiful face. He's been in his room and out with his dad. Derek has no idea by problem has something to do with his son.
I pick up the phone and dial the number.
"Hello? Baizen is that you?" I don't know what I'm doing, my hands have just picked up my phone without a confirmation from me.
"Cal? What are you doing babe it's 6pm. I'm having dinner, you know I can't chat from 6pm to 7. It's my family, you know this." This was the funniest thing about him. His strict family with their ordered evenings.
"I, I just wanted to hear your voice. Sorry for not calling all week, I'm not in the mood." I whispered as I had so little energy in my body. I was lying on my bed with jogging bottoms on and an old shirt.
"I'll accept your apology later, after I've finished my dinner." He ordered which startled my motionless body.
"Coming Father, my apologies. Listen I have to go--"
"Bye." But the phone had already hung up before he could hear me.
That's when I grabbed my coat, slipped on my pumps, took my keys and ran out of the house. Even though I had no determination, I had to get out of the house. I needed to run around and help my brain distress, however hard that may be.