Not This Time

Jon: September 1, 1983

     "I don't know her personally," I sighed with yet another shake of my head, "She works at Dolly's and the guys in the cell over there were harassing her all night."
     "And why were you there?" spat Crew Cut from the cell.
     "Pipe down!" snapped Officer Liles. He glared over my head at the delinquents in the cell. I didn't bother turning around. I knew it would just piss me off again. I kept my eyes on the wall across from me, past Officer Liles.
     Curly, who had woken up from my hit only about five minutes ago, shouted from the cell as well. "Why isn't he in a cell? That ass hole attacked us! Look what he did to my nose!"
     "I said pipe down!" Officer Liles repeated. I glanced up at the old man. He was a very familiar face; I'd grown up only a few blocks over from him as a kid. For all I knew he still lived a there. He'd been a cop as long as I could remember, probably as long as I'd been alive. He had arrested me a few times for minor things in the past, but he also knew that I'd grown up a bit, and had moved on in life. "You were saying?"
     "I wasn't," I shrugged, "That was it."
     Officer Liles nodded and smiled slightly. "Your ride on his way, then?"
     I nodded. "I don't see why I can't just walk home," I complained quietly, "This town's not that big. You know where I live."
     Officer Liles shook his head. "Have you seen your face, son?"
     "Have you seen mine?" Curly grumbled loudly.
     "You'll get your turn at a hospital, stop whining!" Officer Liles barked over my head at them. He looked back down at me, raised an eyebrow, and shook his head. He looked away toward the door just as David appeared in the doorway and knocked on the frame.
     I glanced up at my friend and slowly stood. I wouldn't have denied that my sides ached, but I wasn't about to let it stop me from going home. The last thing I wanted to do was wait around in the police station for an ambulance; it was annoying enough having to wait for a ride home.
     "Goodnight, Jon," said Officer Liles as I headed for the door.
     "You got all the information you need, right?" I asked, just to be sure. With my luck, I'd get all the way home and be on my way to bed when they called to follow up on one last detail.
     Officer Liles laughed. "With everything you told us, and everything the witness told us, there's no need for her to even file a report anymore," he assured me with a nod.
     I nodded as well. "Goodnight then," I said, following David out toward the front of the station. He and I didn't speak as we left the building. We didn't speak as we headed for his car. It wasn't until we were both strapped in and the car was started that he spoke.
     "You look like shit."
     I burst out laughing, which hurt like hell, but I couldn't help it. "Gee, thanks," I chuckled. I turned to look at my friend with a grin. He was laughing too.
     "What did you do?" he asked, shifting into gear and pulling out of his parking space.
     "You remember I told you about that girl that inspired part of Runaway?" I asked.
     "The one you're infatuated with," he corrected.
     I rolled my eyes. "Whatever, you know the girl."
     He nodded. "Nina, right?"
     I nodded. "Three guys had her pinned against the ground," I explained grimly, "I could hear her trying to scream." I shook my head and trailed off, staring out the windshield in front of me. "I'm pretty sure they would have raped her if I hadn't been there."
     In a brief moment of silence, I could hear her muffled protests. I remembered the terror and relief on her face as she got up to run. I remembered Crew Cut telling her to hold still like he had a right to be on top of her. I could feel rage trying to burn in my chest at the thought of that.
     "You stopped them though, right?" David's voice asked, bringing me back to the conversation.
     "Yeah, I got there in time, I think. She might still have nightmares," I sighed. I might still have nightmares. My blood ran cold at the thought of her screams. It made me sick to think what they'd had in store for her had I not stopped them. It made me furious. With a pause, I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. "There was a lady living above her shop across the street from the alley. She heard Nina screaming and called the cops. She could see the whole thing from her window," I sighed, "That's why I'm not in a cell right now."
     "At least those sickos are caged now," David offered, "And she's alright, right?"
     I shrugged. He stopped in front of my parent's house and put the car in park.
     "You did a good thing, Jon," he told me as I got out of his car. I tried to smile, but it wasn't coming. Knowing that I'd done the right thing didn't make me feel better about it having happened. It should never have had to happen.
     "Goodnight," I sighed, shutting the car door behind me. I stood at the curb and watched him drive away. When he was gone, I glanced at my house, almost wanting to go in and plop down on my own bed, but I'd promised Dotty I'd meet her. It was only a few blocks to her house; I could make the walk in ten minutes tops.
     It was already past two in the morning when I got to Dorothea's street. The lights were all out at her house, which meant her parents had already gone to bed. I tried to be quiet as I crept toward the tree that grew outside Dorothea's window. I started to climb the tree, but was caught off guard by the sudden pain in my shoulder. I dropped back to the grass with a stifled groan. I rotated my shoulder, bringing my other hand up to feel for damage. It didn't feel dislocated, but it still hurt to move a lot. I figured I must have strained a muscle or something hitting one of those jerks, or when Crew Cut held my arms behind me.
     Still rubbing my shoulder, I looked up at the tree. This was going to suck, but it was the only way I'd be able to get to Dotty. Her dad would be pissed if he knew this was what his tree was being used for. I closed my eyes and took in a deep breath, bracing myself for the pain. After just one more moment of hesitation, I climbed up into the branches again, powering through the climb to get it over with quickly.
     I stepped over onto the roof and gently knocked on Dorothea's window. I could only see shapes in the dark room beyond. Dorothea shifted and rolled over in bed when I tapped again. I hated that I had to wake her, but she'd told me to. She looked over at me and I smiled.
     Dorothea rolled out of bed and yanked the window open as quietly as she could. We both cringed at the obnoxiously loud scrape sound it made. She smiled at me through the open window.
     "Password?" she snickered.
     I leaned toward her and gave her a peck on the lips. She smiled and moved aside so that I could get through the window. Much like when climbing the tree, my shoulder made this task painful. I grumbled at the ache as I crawled through the window and turned to face the light Dorothea had just turned on.
     She gasped.
     "I know," I sighed, holding my hands up in defense, "I know, don't freak out, I'm fine."
     Dorothea rolled her eyes with a shake of her head. "Let me get some ice," she said, walking softly across her bedroom floor to go downstairs. I'd known she was going to make a fuss, but I'd more expected to get it tomorrow morning. Very carefully avoiding creaky parts of the floor, I made my way out to the bathroom in the hall. 
     Once the door was closed, I flipped on the light. The brightness was a stark contrast to the dark night I'd been wading through outside; it was even brighter than the lamp light in Dotty's room. It took my eyes a minute to adjust, but once they did, I turned and grimaced at my reflection. Oh man. The skin around my right eye was already a solid purple that was sure to turn into a deep blue-black by the time the sun was up. That blonde guy had really socked me one.
     I pulled my shirt up and over my head, causing my shoulder to protest. I frowned and examined my shoulder as best I could in the mirror. It didn't look hurt, but it sure felt it. I looked down and  pressed against various places on my rib cage to make sure none of my ribs were damaged. I could feel a few bruises starting to form, but I didn't think anything was broken. I dropped my shirt on the floor and rubbed my face, wincing only a little when my hand ran over the bruising around my eye.
     "Johnny?" Dorothea's voice whispered as she opened the bathroom door. I looked over at the door and her peeking through it. She was adorable, squinting in the sudden brightness.
     "It's alright, you can come in." I answered. Dorothea closed the door quietly behind her as her eyes adjusted to the light. She set the ice on the counter and turned my head so she could look at my black eye. She dropped her hand onto my shoulder with a frown. I knew by the disapproving expression that followed that she'd noticed me wince.
     "God, Jon, what did you do?" she sighed as she steered me over to sit on the toilet.
     "Why does everyone keep asking me that?" I scoffed.
     Dorothea smiled and shook her head. "Really, though, what happened?" she insisted.
     I paused and Dorothea placed, in my hand, the small bag of ice she'd prepared. I stared down at the ice and absently brought it to my face as my stomach went into a fit of guilt. She was too good to me. The only reason I'd even been at that specific diner was to see Nina. I mean, I didn't even talk to her, so it wasn't like I was cheating, but deep down, some little part of me knew that there was something else pulling me to Nina than a few unsaid words. It was that little part deep down that made me feel guilty for being there.
     I'd been with Dorothea since the summer after our senior year of high school, and that was after almost a whole year of wanting her behind her boyfriend's back. I'd been so sure from the very moment I'd first seen her that I wanted to spend the rest of my life with her. So sure, in fact, that when I looked at Nina and imagined that I could be just as happy with her, it bothered me. I didn't want to be conflicted about who I should be with. I didn't want any 'what ifs'. I hated 'what ifs'.
     To be honest, I wasn't even sure what I felt about Nina. I liked to think that it was more like fascination. I mean, the rumor that I'd heard about her seemed absurdly unrealistic. Everything else I knew about her, I'd learned from one of my old classmates, Luke, who was also Nina's boss. I just wanted to know more about her; it wasn't my fault that she was pretty. Still, I didn't need Dorothea knowing that I'd been hanging around that diner during Nina's shift, trying both to build my courage to say something to her as well as fight back the guilt I felt for even wanting to say something to her at all. I was so sure I'd get over it that I didn't think there was really any point in telling Dorothea about my infatuation.
     "Johnny?" Dorothea prompted again.
     I looked over at her and shrugged. "There was this girl," I began recounting hoarsely. I guess I paused a little too long. It gave Dorothea time to interject a question. The very question I knew she'd ask.
     "Did you know her?"
     I shook my head with another slight shrug. "Not really." It was pretty much true. I knew things about Nina, but I didn't really know her.
     Dorothea nodded and told me to go on.
     "Three guys were attacking this girl in an alley," I continued hesitantly. I didn't want to talk about this either. I closed my eyes and frowned. "They were.." I shook my head again.
     "What?" she breathed.
     "I had to do something," I said, looking back at her, "They were gonna rape her."
     There was a moment of intense silence as I glared at my own reflection in the mirror. Rage burned in my chest again at the thought of it. I could feel Dorothea rubbing my back comfortingly, but it did little to make me feel better.
     "Well," Dorothea crooned, "I don't know whether I'm angry at you or proud of you for risking your life to save some girl you don't know." She smiled, putting out the fire in my chest and leaving only the guilt in my stomach. She was too good for me, but she wanted me anyway. When I looked at Dorothea, I couldn't think of a single reason to pick Nina over her. With assurance in that conclusion, I could feel the guilt in my stomach melt away. I leaned toward her and gave her a kiss. When I let her go, Dorothea smiled again. "I think I'm more proud," she whispered.
     "Lucky me," I snickered as I stood. Dorothea stood as well, asking what else hurt, so I lied. "I'm fine right now," I fibbed, "I'll be sore tomorrow." Dorothea gave me a wry, knowing smile and rolled her eyes, but didn't argue as she wrapped an arm gently around my waist. All I could do was hope I hadn't winced. My stomach hurt from being punched there one too many times, but I wasn't going to tell Dorothea that. I draped my arm across Dorothea's shoulders and tried to ignore the discomfort in my own shoulder; I didn't plan on telling Dorothea about that either.
     She let me go at the bedroom door and wandered lazily back toward her bed. I leaned on the doorframe, no longer holding the ice pack to my eye as I should have been, and watched her retreat to the comfort of her bed. I smiled at her. She stopped before getting into bed and looked back over at me. 
     "You coming?" she asked.
     I nodded and, in one last ditch effort to ease the bruising, lifted the ice pack to my eye again.
     "Let me put this away," I muttered, turning back to the bathroom. I looked in the mirror one last time and grimaced at the ever-deepening purple around my eye. The last thing I wanted was a seriously swollen black eye. Screw what I wanted, that was the last thing I needed.
     Setting the bag of ice in the sink, I snatched my shirt up off the floor and shut off the light. I stepped cautiously back into her bedroom, very aware that her parents' bedroom was just below. I kicked out of my shoes and unbuttoned my pants, dropping my shirt on top of my shoes.
     Dorothea watched in amusement as I wriggled out of my pants. She wasn't shy about letting her eyes wander. Unfortunately, I knew she was only teasing me. With a smirk I leaned forward in front of her.
     "Don't start if you don't want to finish," I warned in a low voice.
     She giggled and turned the light out with one hand as she pulled me into bed with the other. She tried not to laugh as I pulled the covers over both of us and left little kisses along her neck. I grinned at her and she pushed me away.
     "Goodnight, Jon!" she snickered, giving me one last long kiss before snuggling up next to me. I wrapped an arm around her and kissed her forehead.
     "Goodnight, babe."
     I didn't close my eyes. The night and all that had happened in it were keeping me awake. We'd gotten a lot of songs written tonight. We'd gotten a lot done. We were all getting excited about the upcoming tour. I wanted to sleep. I knew I needed to. I knew I'd have to be up and out of Dorothea's bedroom before her parents woke up tomorrow morning around six. There was just so much still happening in my head.
     "Dotty," I said quietly. She made a soft sound of acknowledgement. "You know I'm going on tour soon, right?" Dorothea groaned and looked up at me. I could just see her eyes in the dark when she let out a huff.
     "Don't remind me," she sighed, "I don't really want to think about missing you every day."
     I couldn't help but smirk at the idea that she'd be missing me every day. I did hate it, though, that she'd have to stay here. I kissed her forehead again and then frowned against her skin.
     "I wish you could come with me," I murmured as Dorothea traced little circles in my chest hair. I could feel her fingers on my skin and smiled a little at the tickling sensation.
     "I have to work," Dorothea muttered, obviously trying not to fall asleep in the middle of our conversation. I hugged her gently with a small chuckle.
     "Yeah, and I don't have the money yet," I sighed, "Doesn't mean I can't wish, does it?"
     "You'll call me every night?" Dorothea breathed sleepily. I looked down at her. Her eyes were closed and her fingers were curled up against my chest. I smiled and nodded.
     "Every chance I get, Dotty," I assured her quietly, running my fingers through her hair. I watched her smile, and that made me smile. I tucked her head under my chin as I absently continued petting her hair.
     "Goodnight, Jon," Dorothea yawned, practically asleep already. I smirked at how adorably childish her words sounded through the yawn. I was so glad she was mine. I couldn't imagine loving anybody else as much as her.
     "Sleep tight, baby," I mumbled into her hair. I dropped my head on my pillow, envying Dorothea's ability to drift off so easily. I closed my eyes and tried to sleep too.
     Just when I thought I'd be able to sleep, Nina's screams rang out in my head again.
     I opened my eyes again and stared at the emptiness over Dorothea's head. The terror. Even as a memory, it was bone-chilling. It sounded so real, as if Nina were in the room.
     Dorothea took a deep breath and shifted in my arms, bringing me back to the present. I looked down at her and smiled a little. My girl. My Dotty. Holding her close, I closed my eyes again and tried one more time to fall asleep.