Leah and Trent

Chapter Twenty-four

December 12 2016 - Monday

~

Daniel

(Song: Lie by BTS)

Ever since I was a kid, I've had to face lectures from my father about choice. Specifically the choice of what I wanted to do with my life. I was younger than ten when my father started telling me I had to be smart and work hard so that I could have a future. I begged my parents to put me in wrestling because it was the coolest thing I had ever seen on TV. Spending time training and getting stronger was the only time I actually felt like I had a future. I had a purpose. But it wasn't what my father wanted. It wasn't the right choice to him because the right choice was his choice. Making the "choice" in what I wanted to do was less about what I wanted and more about money, position, and a lot of other things I had no say in.

I sat in the kitchen staring at acceptance letters from different colleges. This was a moment when I was supposed to be happy, like those videos on the internet. I was supposed to be rejoicing- jumping up and down and celebrating with my family. But all I could think about was how these letters were the start of a miserable life that I didn't want.

"Hey." I snapped my neck at the sound of a voice and turned to see my mother walking into the kitchen.

"Hmm." All I could muster was a grunt and a head nod. She stopped directly across from me on the other side of the kitchen island and placed her phone on the counter along with her purse.

"What type of greeting is that? Why are you sulking in the kitchen?" she asked with her hand on her hip.

"I'm not."

"Whatever. I caught your brother messing with the safe yesterday. Did you tell him the code?"

"No, why would I?"

"The last thing I need is for him to get inside the safe. He thinks everything is a toy."

"I didn't tell him."

"What's that?" she asked looking at the mess of envelopes and letterhead in front of me.

"Acceptance letters."

"Really? Great. Your father was beginning to think that you must have been dropped on your head as a baby. What colleges? Are they accredited?"

"Some of the best business colleges in the nation." I noticed the tone in my voice while I was speaking, so I tried to change it. But my voice just ended up being wrapped in faux enthusiasm.

"And you're not satisfied?" she asked noticeably annoyed. How could I be satisfied living like a ghost in someone else's life? I was doomed to turn into an old bitter man filled with regret. An old bitter man that looked to retirement to be my solace. "Don't be a b****. Speak."

"I'm not my father. I'm not you. I don't want to spend my life in some office."

"So, what then?. . .Wrestling. Fighting."

"Maybe."

"It's a childish hobby, and it'll make you stupid- getting thrown around and knocked in the head repeatedly. It's savage. Just be happy. Most people have to suffer in this world. The lackeys would kill to be in your position. Consider yourself fortunate." She cocked her head and smirked before grabbing her purse and stomping out of the kitchen.

I sunk into my chair and crossed my arms. The amount of times I had been told to just shut up and be happy seemed endless. I had everything I could possibly ever want. And if I didn't have something then I could easily get it. When you have everything, you're not supposed to complain because you're fortunate. If I was so fortunate then why did I feel so f***ing hopeless?

I gripped my hands around my arms and stared off at the counter. I heard the sound of a ding and saw my mother's phone light up on the counter. There was a message on the lock screen.

Hey Sexy, Where are you?

I leaned forward and uncrossed my arms. The phone went dark, but quickly lit up again.

Is leaving a man waiting one of your new tricks

I snatched up the phone and stared at the lock screen until it went blank. I thought there might have been some type of mistake since my father was at work, and he never would have sent a text like that to my mother anyway. Who the h*** was texting her strange messages?

I turned the screen on and tapped the message on the lock screen. The phone demanded a passcode from me. I quickly typed in my mother's birth year, and the phone unlocked. I stared at the phone, scrolling through conversations that she had with some man named Sebastian. She flirted with this guy. They talked about sleeping with each other. They talked about hiding things from my father. They sent pictures to each other. I slammed the phone down on the counter and shot out of my seat.

"Daniel, can you hand me my phone?" my mother said walking back into the kitchen. I stormed pass her and rushed out of the house. "Daniel!" I heard my mother yelling while I walked towards my car in the driveway. The clacking of heels followed me, until she grabbed my arm and pulled me to a stop. "What did you see?" I turned and looked her in the eye.

"I saw enough. . .enough to know that you're cheating on dad with some- with some random a**h***."

"Watch your mouth. Look, it's nothing serious-"

"Like h*** it isn't."

"Watch. Your. Mouth. Don't go telling your father about things you don't understand."

"You know he's going to find out. It's not like you're trying to hide it."

"Like I said, don't go telling your father about things you don't understand. Hear me?"

"Whatever." I started to turn away, but she tugged on my arm.

"Excuse me," she said gripping my arm as hard as she could. Her nails dug into my skin as if she was trying to draw blood.

"Yes, mam." She let go of my arm and strutted off towards her car. I stood there staring at the ground and listening as her car revved up and rode off.

This was the life my parents wanted for me. Work. Stress. Infidelity. My father probably had no clue what was happening right under his nose. I wondered what he'd do if he found out. Would he be fine with it? He had everything he wanted. He was fortunate, wasn't he? Would all of the money and all of the possessions make up for sleeping next to a cheater? Perhaps I was doomed to lead the same life as my father.

I got in my car and drove off. I drove around the neighborhood and around the city aimlessly. I didn't have a destination in mind. Even if I did, I had no real way of getting there. I was beginning to think that the "choice" my father taught me was less about choice and more about just following along with the road that was already laid out before me whether I wanted to or not.

(Song: Dollhouse by Melanie Martinez)