Leah and Trent

Chapter Thirty-four

January 16 2017 - Monday

~

Leah

(Song: Falling Short by Lapsley)

Everything was different. Everything before that night didn't seem to matter as much now and everything after it looked different. It was like things were cloudier, and yet clearer at the same time. I constantly looked around and observed people watching people's movements and listening to everyone's words. I wondered who else was like Daniel. Who else was like me.

I found myself on guard all the time. There was a moment in gym class when a guy bumped into me. I instantly froze and this chilling wave went through my body. I almost pushed him away, before he apologized and walked away.

Brittany and I didn't share any classes, but I also didn't really try to find her in the halls. I didn't feel like talking to anyone. What was there to talk about? Winter break? I didn't want to talk about that. I didn't even want to think about that. And I didn't want to run the risk of it being brought up in conversation.

I didn't go to a single cheer practice once school started back up. I never even liked being on the team. I just did it because I thought it would make my mom happy and proud of me. I wondered how long it would take for someone to say something to me, and It wasn't all that long because one day when I was sitting in the living room watching TV my mom walked in and turned the TV off. She stood in front of me with both hands on her hips and her eyes popping out of their sockets.

"Leah, have you not been going to cheer practice?" she asked.

"Yes."

"Yes, as in you haven't?"

"Yes."

"Why?"

"I don't feel like going."

"You don't feel like it?"

"No, mom, I don't."

"What is this attitude?"

"I don't-"

"Yes, you do."

"I don't want to do it anymore, okay. Is that fine?"

". . .No, it isn't." Her face started to heat up as she clenched her jaw. "You're a varsity cheerleader, Leah. You can't throw that away. It's about dedication and effort. Do you think it looks good to quit after five years? Do you think that colleges won't care?"

"I don't care, mom!"

". . .You don't care. . .Fine." She started to walk away, but then turned back and pointed her finger at me. "If you don't care, and you just want to quit then you need to tell the coach. I don't need people calling me at work." She stormed away and I turned the TV back on.

I tried to put my mind on the show, but my blood was so riled up that I was ready to shoot up off of the sofa, like a firework. I tapped my foot against the hardwood floor, trying to release this pent up energy. A sound behind me caught my attention, and I quickly turned.

"Hey, sorry, I didn't mean to sneak up on you." Leonard stood behind the couch with his hands in his pockets. "I thought I heard arguing."

"It wasn't really arguing."

"Oh. . .uhm, is everything okay, then?"

". . .Yeah."

". . .Okay." There was something off about him. He wouldn't look me in the eye. He spoke in a very soft and garbled tone. I almost didn't even understand what he was saying.

"Why?" I asked confused by his demeanor.

"What?"

"Why are you asking? Why are you acting so strangely?"

"I'm not- I just was concerned because of the, uhm, commotion. I'm sorry, I am acting strange. I'll just. . ." He slowly walked away and disappeared behind a wall.

"What was that?" I said to myself.

(Song: Limit To Your Love by James Blake)