Hey y'all. I've been meaning to update all night but I've distracted myself with watching some trinity videos on YouTube. I have some ideas for a few upcoming chapters but I'm losing ideas! I don't know how much longer this fic will be, sadly. I'm definitely going to write more after this one though so don't worry! These upcoming chapters may be triggering so just a heads up. P.S. If I refer to someone as 'the blonde' it means Hannah and 'the brunette' it means Grace, ya know since they've died their hair? Oh also, if you wanna follow my tumblr, it's no-one-will-tear-us-apart. I post a bunch of trinity stuff on there so go check that out! Ok enough of that, enjoy!
Grace's Pov
She left me.
She hates me.
I don't blame her.
"I hate me too." I whisper to myself.
I just sit there on the floor for awhile.
I don't know what to do with myself.
Two great relationships were ruined.
And it's all because of me.
Hannah was right, I broke her. I knew what she's been through before but I still fucking did the exact same thing as all her other girlfriends have.
How could I be so selfish? I used being drunk as an excuse....wow I would dump me too.
As I sit here crying and thinking I decide to shoot Mamrie a text.
To: Mames
Hi. I know you don't wanna talk to me right now and I wouldn't wanna talk to me either but I just want you to know that it wasn't Jason's fault. It was all my fault so please don't blame him. I'm sorry.
I press send.
I'm hoping that they'll get back together but I know that's probably not going to happen.
I call Hannah a few times. I leave one voice message.
"Hannah, hun. I am so entirely, truthfully, sorry. I know you hate me and frankly, I don't blame ya. Text or call me when you're ready.....if you're ready. I love you. Bye."
I wonder if she would be able to understand me through my cries.
I just want my best friend and the love of my life back.
I've come to terms with the fact that that won't happen.
I'm really tired but I don't have the energy to pull myself up.
I begin to fall asleep when my thoughts interrupt.
Uh oh.
I'm having urges again.
I can't relapse.
I just can't.
It's been almost 7 months since I self-harmed last.
My scars have faded but my brain is telling me to re-open them again.
My brain wins.
