Gary quietly opened the door to their bedroom, and tiptoed in. He saw her curled up under the blanket, still asleep. He sat beside her being careful not to wake her up, and listened to her soft breathing. Although it pains him to see her grieving, he felt relief at the same time knowing that she managed to let it all out. He didn't like it when she pretended to be fine.
She stirred slightly but her eyes remained closed. Gary took it as a sign that it was time for him to leave the room. He grabbed his laptop, tiptoped out, and gently closed the door.
He sat down on the sofa and flipped open his laptop on the coffee table. Once it was switched on, he began typing away on the keyboard. There were a few documents that he needed to settle.
Another two hours passed, and he was finally done with all his work. He stretched his arms, then grabbed his phone and leaned back against the sofa. He was resting, spending some time scrolling through his Instagram when he heard the sound of footsteps approaching. He glanced up from his phone and saw Jihyo walking towards him. Her eyes were slightly swollen.
He patted the empty space beside him. She went to him and sat down. He placed his arm around her shoulders, and she leaned into him, snuggling against his chest. A comfortable silence settled around them. It lasted for a few minutes until Gary eventually spoke.
"Your mum seems to be looking better." He said as he stroked her upper arm.
"She is." She replied. "I told her that I may be pregnant."
Gary's hand stopped moving. Jihyo stared at his reflection in the blank TV screen, and he too, was staring at hers.
She held herself away from him and looked at his face. It was hard to read his expression.
"I've been wanting to tell you when I came back but things happened and I just didn't have the time to talk to you about it." She said, holding his hand.
It took him awhile to think of how to react, not knowing that he was actually frowning until he noticed the slightly worried look on her face.
"I'm not mad." He said to her, afraid that she misunderstood. "This is a great news. Have you been to the doctor?"
She shook her head.
"Wait a minute," he told her, then got up and walked into their bedroom.
He pulled out a box from under the bed and rummaged through the baby stuff to search for the name card of the gynaecologist. He brought it out and passed it to Jihyo who was surprised that he still has it with him. She remembered telling him to throw away all the stuff related to the baby after she suffered from a miscarriage.
"Actually, I kept all of it." He said.
He showed her the opened box on the bed. She slowly walked towards it, took the box and sat on the bed. She emptied the box item by item. The pregnancy test kit. The little bunny plush. The white onesie set. The yellow onesie that Gary wanted to get so badly, and lastly, the image of her ultrasound.
The memories that faded; the ones that she tries hard to forget were trickling back. She wasn't going to cry. She told herself not to.
"I'm sorry. I was afraid that you will be unhappy when you see it so I hid it." He said.
She gazed at the photo, tracing her fingers across the surface. "If it was back then, I would have been really mad." She said and looked at him, "but right now, I feel glad and thankful to be seeing all these again. Our bittersweet memories."
The smile on her face brought much relief to him. He thought he would never be able to see that smile of hers when he decided to show her the box. After all, he remembered two weeks after the unfortunate incident, Jihyo flew into a rage and took out all the baby items that were stored in the drawer and instructed him to throw them away. He kept them away from her sight for more than a year until today, when he finally showed it to her.
Has she moved on? He hope that she did.
***
They paid a visit to the gynaecologist, and as Jihyo undergo several tests inside the treatment room, Gary waited outside patiently until the nurse called him in. The gynaecologist broke the news to them, confirming what Jihyo had suspected. She was indeed pregnant.
Having suffered from a miscarriage previously, the gynae told them that Jihyo will have a slightly higher chance of having another miscarriage, and that certainly didn't sit too well with her. She was determined to keep this baby safe and carry it to full term.
After they left the clinic, they had dinner at a traditional Korean restaurant before heading off to another place. Gary didn't tell her where they were going, and naturally, Jihyo assumed that they were heading home.
She was fast asleep when they arrived at the place. He gently woke her up. She blinked her eyes opened, and looked around. The car was parked in a parking lot but it wasn't the underground car park of their apartment building. It was pitch dark, except for a few streetlights. The trees were swaying in the wind. She stepped out of the car. The scent of seawater hung in the air. He had brought her to the beach.
He extended his hand out towards her, and she looked at it for a few seconds, wondering what was this all about. She eventually gave him her hand and let him lead the way.
They walked a distance until they reached the breakwater. They climbed up and sat there.
"Why are we here?" She asked.
"We haven't been here ever since we got married." He looked at her and said. "It's nice to be back, isn't it?"
She didn't answer but just stared out at the sea.The sound of the crashing waves broke the stillness of the night. She watched as it wash up onto the shore and slowly recedes. She guessed that that wasn't the only reason why he brought her here. His intention was perhaps to give her some peaceful, quiet moments to unwind since having to deal with her dad's sudden passing and the confirmation of her pregnancy, it indeed felt like they were riding on a rollercoaster ride of emotions. And the best place would, of course, be at the beach.
"Gomawo, yeobo." She said.
"For what?" He looked at her, slightly puzzled.
"Just.. for everything." She replied, taking his hand and interlocked her fingers with his, and rest her head on his shoulder.
