tutor • donny pangilinan

12

12 | Sierra

"You want some?"

Donny hands me a glass of drink, it's been half an hour since we got here. Nothing much happened, we just greeted Donny's parents tapos he also introduced me to few of his cousins, sobrang bait nila.

"Sierra, I'll be back. Okay?

I nod, I watch him as he walks out from the venue. I just stood at one of those party tables with my drink beside. The place is filled with chatting people, few are dancing some waltz at the dancefloor and some are just doing the same thing that I am doing.

I feel the need to go to the bathroom to fix myself a little, I walked away from the tables and started to bump into people doing things simultaneously. I was about to reach the corner of the room, I accidentally pour a glass of drink to one of the guests, she's the daughter of a businessman that Donny's dad is working with. Patay ako dito.

Sumigaw sya ng muntik ako mabingi sa sigaw nya, oa rin makareact pwe.

"I'm sorry." Kumuha ako ng pamunas para sa kanya.

"Don't touch me!" Napatigil ako sa pagpunas sa damit nya ng sumigaw sya sa'kin.

"I-I'm really sorry." I froze, natatakot na ako.

The girl is just glaring at me deadly, people are watching the drama that is happening. I feel embarassed, when I'm about to break down and cry, I felt a warm and familiar arms hold me.

"It's time to leave." he whispers as we walk out of the party, he leads me to his car and there I started crying.

I keep my head down, I didn't mind if my make up is going to be ruined. I just curled up in the passenger's seat, sobbing. Donny keeps his eyes on the road, didn't bother to talk to me. I didn't know where we are going as well, hopefully he won't kill me after what I did. It was actually an accident.

After a long drive, I was astonished by the beauty of the city. Parking at the cliff, perfect view for the busy city. We hopped out from the car walking towards the cliff. It was beautiful, the stars are brighter than how I usually see them before I left from my shift. The fresh air fanning my hair and inhaling it into my system.

Donny prepared a blanket and we sat there, he hands me a jacket of his. His varsity jacket. I can't believe Donny lend me his jacket. I know girls from school will scream if Donny will lend his jacket to them, ikamamatay nila I'm sure of that.

Staying here, watching the busy and noisy city. Looking up, seeing the twinkling and peaceful stars. Chaos and the calm. Silence surrounds us at the moment, I love the feeling of this. Silence. Just silence.

"I've been here a couple of times. It's my favorite place to think and forget everything behind."

I looked at his direction who is looking up at the stars, I've never seen this side of him. I guess, there is many things I should learn about him, not just a pretty face. Wait, what? Did I really say that?

"Wow. That was deep, may pinaghuhugutan?" I chuckle at his words, trying to keep the happy me.

I honestly think this is a place where I can be myself, try not to care what people would say about me. Sometimes, I think that when I say something about how I feel, I usually lose them.

"Wala naman, I just wanted you to know about it. You know, I don't like sharing things about my personal life. I like to keep it to myself, but I'm here. Trying to tell you a little piece of me."

"People know a lot about you. You are a Pangilinan, and you are basically a public figure. Everybody knows you." I stated wrapping my legs with my arms.

"That's the problem. Everybody knows me as a Pangilinan, but they don't see me as me. The Donny." He sighed as he looks down to the view before us.

"Is that why you're mad? Because of it?"

"Is it hard to understand?!? Forget it."

"Stop being so stubborn!"

"Stop being so slow!"

"Oh! Sorry for being so slow, it's because you are not saying it! Can you just spill the beans?!?"

"The point is, I want to earn my own name and not depend on my family's name. I tried so hard to please people and to see me as me."

And there goes nothing, I feel speechless with his words. I didn't know about how he feels when people only likes him because of being a Pangilinan. He was right, there is so much in him that people should know.

He goes quiet after stating that, all I can hear are the twinkling stars above which are also fading away. The cold wind fanning my cold and tired body. I stare at him as he looks down at his hands playing with each other.

"You are a great guy, Donny. Always remember that and I don't get why people don't see you as you."

I continued, "You know, you don't have to please people. Try not to look at them, because sometimes people try to ruin beautiful things and I don't want you to be one of it."

I saw him smile even though it's a bit dark, his smile still shines. I smiled back at him and then looking away.

"Seventeen years ago, I was abandoned. My parents doesn't want me, they said I was just an accident and I am not special. So, ayun kinupkop ako nung nanay-nanayan ko ngayon."

"Wait, yung nanay mo ngayon is not your biological mom?" I nodded as he asks.

"Siya yung best friend ng mama ko, ibinigay ako ng totoo kung nanay sa kanya at nung sinubukan kong bumalik sa totoo kung nanay sabi nya hindi ko na daw sya guguluhin dahil may pamilya na syang iba tapos sabi nya hindi nya raw ako minahal. I was eleven that time, sobrang bata ko pa nun para marinig ang mga bagay na yun, pero walang patawad yung nanay ko. Hinayaan nyang mangyari yun." I wipe a tear away at that experience.

He was quiet, and I thought he was listening so I continued. "Sinubukan ko ring hanapin yung tatay ko pero walang may alam kung saan sya. Ngayon, hindi ko na sila iniisip. Alam ko naman na kung saan man sila, alam kong masaya sila."

"I'm sorry. Sorry dahil I say bad things about you and making fun of you dahil nga, yung wala kang papa. I didn't know they left you, I'm sorry. I really am."

"Okay lang yun, I get that a lot." I smiled weakly at him.

Donny was the only person I told the real story, nobody knew about it because I don't have many friends or close friends in general. I feel much better know that I told someone about it.

▫▫▫

less ranting okay. don't forget to vote and comment!