tutor • donny pangilinan

14

14 | Sierra

"Tino, saan si Donny?"

"Di ko alam eh, probably he's with Ali again."

"Ahh, ganun ba. Sige." he nods as I say it and then walk away from him.

It's been few days since the last time I talked to him—that time I met Ali. Nakikita ko naman sya sa klase pero hindi ko sya naaabutan, he leaves early. Sa pagkakaalam ko, sa International School Manila nag-aaral si Ali, pinupuntahan nya siguro. Ilang araw na din akong naghihintay sa kanya sa library pero hindi sya nagpapakita, tinetext ko naman sya pero hindi sya nagrereply.

I continued walking on the way to the library, nagbabasakaling makita ko sya. I still have to tutor him, hindi pa naman kasi nagsabi si Sir Anthony na hihinto ako sa pagtuturo.

Halos ma-memorize ko na yung mga book titles na nasa shelf sa harapan ng table kung saan ako umuupo. I waited for thirty minutes, then an hour passed. But I didn't saw him.

Di ko alam kung gusto nya pa ba akong makita, kung iniiwasan nya ako, kung ayaw nya lang talaga makita pagmumukha ko, o di kaya busy lang talaga sya sa buhay nya. I sighed as I thought about all of it, I stood up from my seat and walk out from the library. Walking away from school.

-;-

"Ate Sierra!" a familiar voice called out. I turn to look seeing Hannah, then I smiled as I approach her.

"Can you give this to kuya?" she hands me a book for a class, nakalimutan nya siguro 'to.

"Eh kaso, hindi ko sya naaabutan sa mga subjects na kasama kami eh. Palaging nagmamadali."

"So, hindi na kayo nag-uusap?"

"Hindi na, pero sige. Hayaan mo, hahanapin ko sya para mabigay ko 'to." Nagpasalamat sya at umalis, busy pa siguro sya.

I have a free hour today, so I decided to look around para maibigay ko tong libro nya. Sa pagkakaalam ko, vacant din ni Donny ngayon kaya possible na naglibot-libot lang yun.

I went to the field, cafeteria, lobby and even at the library, but there was no Donny. I had a class on the last hour, so I decided to get my book from my locker when I suddenly saw a figure that I haven't seen up close for a while, it's Donny.

"Donny, pinabigay pala ni Hannah." I reach the book to him, nothing much changed to his face up close. He feels alive and loved. I thought.

"Thank you, I was about to get this from her. I didn't know you have this." He smiled as he got the book, I didn't respond then he turned around and continued his pace. There was something inside me that misses the way we had our conversations, it wasn't like it used to be.

And just that, I walked to my class like nothing happened, which is actually true. Nothing really happened, just having a conversation with a friend. I didn't pay much attention in the class because it was just an ordinary class, I guess. I really don't know.

-;-

Donny

It's Friday, yes. I'm always excited when Fridays come, because I'm done with all the school stuff. But this Friday is very special, because we are going on a hike. The whole Seniors are going on a trip before high school ends in a few months.

The cold air fanning my well fixed hair by the air condition from the bus, waiting for the teacher to stop talking and start hiking. Blah... Blah... Blah...

"Make sure to bring the important things, let's enjoy Seniors!" Ms. Daisy, our P.E. teacher, announced. We all cheered and hurriedly head out from the bus.

I'm with my friends—Tino, Stella, Karina, Carlo, Troy, David, Claudia and Syd. We were talking about how our lives would be in the future, we also talked about meeting up after a decade just so we can catch up. Sobrang advance ng mind set namin kasi in a few months, magkakahiwalay na kami.

"You guys can go ahead, I'll just catch up." I say while I stop from the long walk and then drink my water.

"Sige, see you around. Let's go!" Troy nodded and then they continued to walk. I rested for a while and sat on a rock, all I can hear is the noise of nature. This feels great.

I stood up brought my bag with me, I was about to go but I was caught up by a girl I haven't talked for a few weeks now. Sierra. I haven't showed up in her classes for almost a month now, kasi busy sa life lang walang love. Nung first few days kong hindi pumupunta sa library, she always texts me like "Asan ka ba?" or "San ka oy" things like that and sometimes, she calls me but I didn't answer. After a week or two of her trying to reach me, she stopped. Like she said na "Give up na me." She was tired, probably. I don't know.

I didn't know that we were looking at each other for more than a minute which is awkward, I tried to study her face. But it was emotionless, she doesn't show me the happy Sierra, or sad Sierra, or even angry or annoyed Sierra. It was just blank. I don't know if I should approach her or not because she's probably annoyed with me because I keep ignoring her. Why do I ignore her?

"Hey Sier, how are you doing?" Freak it Donny, that's the best you got.

"I'm fine." she answered blankly, she was right. Why are you asking that question when you purposely didn't show up to her classes for almost a month now. We walked together. I kept glancing at her but she was just looking at her steps.

"I'm sorry, about uh.... Uh-not showing up... I was j-just busy with you know, things." I cleared my throat and explained myself.

"Okay lang." matipid niyang sabi, grabe sya sobrang laki pala talaga ng kasalanan ko.

"Di bale, starting next week. I'll be back again at the library, dun pa rin yung meeting place for tutor?"

"Baka wala ng next time."

"Bakit naman?"

"Matagal akong naghintay, tuwing hapon ako naghihintay. I tried contacting you pero hindi ka sumasagot kaya't minabuti ko ng hindi ka guluhin."

"You can't do that! You're still working for me."

"I'm working for your mom and dad, kakausapin ko na si Sir Anthony na mas mabuting maghanap nalang sya ng ibang magtu-tutor sayo."

"Eh sinong magtu-tutor sa'kin?! Eh, ikaw yung gusto ko."

Why the heck did I say that?

Bigla syang natahimik after I said it. Is there something wrong? I tried tracing any facial emotion, the only emotion she showed me—shocked. It's not that obvious but I can see it in her eyes.

"Look, I'm sorry. Just give me another chance, I'll show up on Monday."

I'm hoping she would give me another chance, kasi kahit anong pa-cute ko sa kanya hindi talaga kaya ng powers ko.

"Sige na nga." she groaned, I jumped around in joy. She always makes me smile and I don't know how she makes me feel this way.

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what's up? I'm back :) thank you for being patient with me medj nawala sa focus eh