Nyla
I've been crying all night, just hoping to hear something regarding my baby. So far it's been 4 hours and not once has a doctor given me any information about his condition. I've occasionally asked the lady at the front desk and she repeatedly tells me he's still in surgery.
Lyric has been by my side this entire time, it's sad that I can't even count on Julian to show up. I called and told him Skylar was in the hospital fighting for his life and he hasn't even showed up. Even though he admitted that he wasn't ready to be a father, you'd think he would still show up.
Lyric held me close constantly telling me that Sky would make it, I sure hope he makes it out of surgery because I need my baby. He's the reason I wake up every morning, the reason I breathe.. he's my life, I just can't loose him.
All morning lyric has tried to get me to eat. I just can't bring myself to stomach anything not right now anyway.
"Would like something to eat?"
"Lyric I told you I don't have an appetite, I'll take some coffee though"
"Ok, I'll be right back"
I sat back wrapping Skylar's favorite blanket around my shoulders before closing my eyes. Tears escaped, I can still see the images of my child gasping for air looking up at me with pleading eyes as of to say help me. Being a helpless mother watching her child bleed out all while trying to hold pressure on the little bullet hole in his upper stomach.
Santana had shot my baby in attempt to shoot me. He was arrested, but he has connections throughout the city. Therefore I wouldn't be surprised if they overlook this situation and let him out. I wish my parents were here, they don't even know they have a grandchild.
I kept glancing at the clock watching each hour go by, getting that nervous feeling in my chest each time the doors open. Only to become disappointed because the doctor has yet to come out and that scares me.
I felt strong arms pull me into a hug, resting my face in his chest I let out small sobs. Wondering what have I done to find myself in this situation. Why couldn't the bullet have struck me instead?
"Why couldn't it have been me?"
"Don't say that, you can't go back on what happen. No matter how many times you think it should have been you nothing will change. Its a shame something like this had to happen in the first place. We have to hope and pray God doesn't call him home. And if he does God forbid, you just have to accept that it was his time.. I know it's not something a mother wants to hear about her child but it's the reality of life"
His words sunk it but he's right it's not something I want to hear. My son didn't even turn 2 yet and he's going through all of this. As his mom I can't help but wonder how this will affect him. I just want to take the pain away and hold him tight.
"Your right it's not something I want to hear nor think about. I just have to get away from this craziness. I never thought I'd ever be in this kind of situation"
"I feel you, I lost my daughter a few years back.. she was my pride and joy. She kept saying daddy, daddy let's go to the beach. I had been so tired from work, so I told her we would go the next day. She went on to tell me how sad she was that we hadn't been spending much time together. I felt bad because I had been working overtime to pay for her dance class, daycare and bills. Her mom had died the year before, car accident, the same car accident that almost claimed my daughter's life but by the grace of God she survived. Doctors said she shouldn't have survived so it was a miracle that she did. Anyway we packed our bags and headed down to the beach. The sun was shining it was a beautiful day, not many people were out considering the fact that it was an early Sunday morning. She went to play by the water, I told her not to go to far. I had fallen asleep sitting in the sand but I don't remember closing my eyes. I heard screams daddy help me, daddy help me. Jumping up I looked out to see her deep in the water drowning. I couldn't swim so I panicked, I rushed into the water hoping I made it in time and didn't drown myself before getting to her. The fact that I couldn't swim made it harder to get to her, and when I did it was too late.. I blame myself everyday, if only I hadn't of closed my eyes I would have caught her before she went out too far..."
His voice cracked as he told the story I cannot imagine how hard that must have been. No parent should have to loose their child, ever. I could see the hurt in his eyes just thinking about his daughter.
"Its not your fault, sometimes things happen it's out of our control. Don't beat yourself up, it could have still happen if you were up. I'm sorry about your lost.. how old was she?"
"3, next month marks 4 years since she died. My baby would have been 7 last month. I miss her so much.."
My heart ached so bad, seeing him completely breakdown thinking about his child. He lost his girlfriend and then a year later his child. You never know what someone is going through, behind every smile is a story, a story that may be good or bad.
I held him allowing him to cry on my shoulder. I don't know how he feels but I'm going to try my best to be there for him. He has no one else to turn to, Lyric has been living by himself since his daughter died. His family doesn't talk to him anymore because they blame him for Delilah's death.
Just then the doctor walked out, making his way over to Lyric and I.
"Hello, I just wanted to come out and tell you that we were able to get the bullet out and stop the bleeding. He's still unconscious in the recovery room, because he's so small he was put in a medically induced coma to allow him to heal"
I thanked the doctor, following him to the room Sky was put in. I'm thankful he was fortunate enough to survive such a tragic event. Entering the room I watched his chest rise and fall with the help of the ventilator.
I sat by his bed side caressing his face. Promising him that mommy would be by his side until he opened his eyes..
