Murphy Prince // Dear Evan Hansen //

>-5-<

Also, does anyone even ship Evan x Zoe anymore? I guess everyone just needs the gayness. That's what I'm here for. Thank you Ellen, for teaching me the ways of the gay.

Whenever I try to spell 'and' it's autocorrects to JD

In case any of you don't know what Be More Chill is. Rich and Jeremy basically have these computers in their brain, if you want to know more listen to this

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=RJnUJ4dgfwg

And the computer is blocking Jake from Richs vision and Michael from Jeremy's vision. Yes all four of them are characters in the musical as well as the girls, got it, okay!

Jake - WWWHOOOO!!! Take a fuckin sip!

Jake had invited Jeremy, Michael, and I over to his house. I guess he expected me to be able to flirt with his sister Jenna and his friends Chloe, Brooke, and Christine. I wasn't interested in any of them. It was obvious that Brooke was interested in Chloe, Chloe was a bitch, Jenna spent no time off her phone, but Christine was nice, not my type for romance, but my type for a friend.

Soon, we were all drunk off our minds. Chloe had grabbed the Mountain Dew from Jakes fridge and started spraying it at us all. She turned right around and blasted it into my mouth and Jeremy's.

I giggled but felt something inside me. It hurt like hell and felt like something was traveling through my blood. I cried out in pain and collapsed on the ground. Jeremy screamed and flung himself into Michaels arms. We were both in so much pain.

Jake - CHLOE! WHAT THE FUCKIN HELL?!!!!!
Chloe - It's YOUR Mountain Dew! How am I supposed to know that you put some kind of poison in it!
Jenna - Holy fuck, Instagram is gonna flip.

Pain was all I could feel in that moment. I looked above me and saw two dark brown eyes. I recognized them as the stars from heaven that were given to Jake Dillingers eyes.

Stop Richard! That's gay! And gay is not okay, you hear me! Looks like I'm gonna have to turn optic nerve blocking.

Oh no

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Jeremy - MICHAEL! IT HURTS! ITS BACK! WHERE IS IT???!!!!!!

My heart stopped. I knew what this had to be. Jeremy has never been in this much pain since the squip incident. I told him not to have Mountain Dew again, to stop the squip from gaining its power over him again. But I guess I was just to drunk to realize.

Michael - Do any of you guys have Mountain Dew Red?!
Chloe - Why would any of us have THAT?
Brooke - To get that, you'd need a time machine to the 1990s!
Christine - Maybe explain what's going on with Jeremy and Rich!
Michael - Okay, so basically, when Jeremy and Rich were in high school. Rich had found out about this thing called a Super Quantum Unit Intel Processor, Squip for short! The quantum computer in the pill will travel through your blood until it implants in your brain and it tells you what to do. And it's activated by Mountain Dew and so basically Jeremy and Rich have a computer in their brain and it won't come out u less they drink Mountain Dew Red!

...

Jake - What th- RICH!! RICH STOP NO!!!

We all turned around to see Rich sprinting out of the door while Jeremy was still collapsed on the floor. Jake pushed past us and went out running after Jake. The night was dark, and I knew that I had to stay and get Mounta-