CHAPTER 8
It was like a lightning struck on me and I suddenly started to think about the past, just memories on memories going through my head like a slide show. I thought about it for a while, feeling disgusted to the point where I went into shock. I remembered almost everything that had happened for straight 2 years, and the fact that I remembered, and thought about it late what was triggered me. I'm the type of girl that doesn't realize things till it's too late to confront a person, and once I remember such things, I end up having the most ugliest mood anyone can't imagine. I stood at my table for a while, just thinking. I noticed tears slithering down my cheeks while remembering, what I've gone through. What pain I went through, that nobody, will ever understand. Everyone has different body shapes, different energy, different pace, different everything. We're all unique in our own way. And for some reason, people just don't get the fact of uniqueness. They tend to get jealous, angry, and annoyed. The best thing about being unique is that the way you create things, and wear things, nobody else could make it as identical as you can.
They might made fun of it, and the next thing you know, after a few days when people stop bothering you, or give you dirty looks, they end up doing what you did, and people are surprised at the point that the person did so, because that exact person, was making fun of you. You created it, so be proud of it. Don't let others tell you what exactly to do. Because some day, it will back fire.
I lay down at my bed at thought some more, and more, and more. It was so horrible because I was putting myself in tension, ruing myself. These people said such things, took actions to do so because they wanted to see me in this certain condition. But, you only turn that way if you want to. It's your choice. But just remember this; they want to see you succeed, but not more then them. It's how humanity reacts to successful people, it's shameful, I find it disgusting. The amount of jealousy people have now a days is over taking the person itself, it makes you into a person you can never be in reality, because, in reality what's controlling you is the feedback, the people, the atmosphere.
I turned to go to my fridge, and nothing good was there.. Then I thought to myself, "What are you doing, you aren't even hungry, your forcing yourself to eat." Just the enjoyment of eating food makes me happy. The fact that the people that are surrounding me aren't so pleasuring, I find it easier to pleasure myself. Now a days, people are really starting to annoy me. They give different, unique people certain stares like they're underestimating you while your playing gym for example, if you can't hit the ball, they totally expected that from you, because you're "fat." People should learn to stop underestimating, and start believing. Life is short, and it'll pass by fast if you do not take the courage to stand up for yourself... Be happy, act free.
